


This Boy I Know

by spiders_stars



Category: Supernatural RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, M/M, Younger!Jensen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-10-16
Updated: 2011-10-16
Packaged: 2017-11-11 11:20:04
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 3
Words: 24,143
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/477979
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/spiders_stars/pseuds/spiders_stars
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>As far back as Jensen could remember, he’d been in love with his straight best friend Jared. When Jared turns out to be not-so-straight and not in love with Jensen in return? That’s just a little too much for Jensen to handle.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

The sound of plastic connecting hard with cement was the only warning Jensen got before cool, dark foamy liquid was splashing up over his khakis, undoubtedly instantly staining the material with the foul stench of alcohol. He’d have to do his own laundry tomorrow if he wanted to keep his parents from finding out that he wasn’t hanging out with his best friend like he’d said he was. Well, he would be hanging out with him, but just not in the boy’s bedroom watching movies or playing video games.

Jensen was pretty sure his parents were incredibly naive. Which he found a little remarkable considering they’d lived through Josh’s high school years. Somehow they never seemed to realize his best friend wasn’t the _let’s stay in and play X-Box_ type. Then again, when it came to Jared Padalecki, that amazing best friend of Jensen’s, his parents only ever saw sunshine and halos. Somehow Jared had both his own parents and Jensen’s parents fooled into thinking he was the perfect little angel.

Maybe because he was the youngest boy in two decades to make Varsity Quarterback, something of a legend already. Or maybe because he always minded his P’s and Q’s, along with the _yes ma’am’s_ and _let me hold the door for you, Mrs. Ackles_. Or maybe it was just those damn dimples he got whenever he smiled, which were something of a force all their own. Actually, Jensen was of the belief that Jared was just kind of perfect in general because well, he was. 

Jared Padalecki was Jensen’s gorgeous, breathtaking, one hundred percent perfect life-long best friend. And Jensen was completely head over heels in love with him. Jared also happened to be the straightest person alive and was dating head cheerleader Sandy McCoy, because of course his perfect little life would have to include a perfect little girlfriend.

Which likely didn’t matter, considering Jared was a summer away from being a Senior, a month shy of eighteen, king of the world so to speak. Jensen was just a barely fifteen year old soon-to-be-sophomore who’d been Jared’s tag along side kick from the day he was born. Even if Jared was magically gay, he’d never be interested in someone like Jensen. So Jensen watched and pined and savored every moment Jared spent with him alone and Jared just kept... being perfect.

Currently, Jensen was doing what he did best. Which was hunting Jared down amongst the crowd of crazy high-schoolers that were celebrating the end of the school year. Tomorrow Jared was flying to L.A. to spend the summer with his brother and Jensen was miserable about the idea. As far back as he could remember summers had meant no homework, long sunny days laying out on Jared’s trampoline or splashing in the neighborhood public pool, cookies made by either of their mothers. Most importantly though, it was just Jared and him. Sometimes Sandy but she had her own friends to lay out and tan with.

Jensen had no idea what he would do without Jared for three whole months. At the moment though he was more focused on trying to find Jared at all. 

“Heya Jenny!” Chad’s call was loud enough to be heard over the milling crowd and Jensen flinched, bracing himself. Moments later the boy was throwing arms around his shoulders and attempting to jump on his back. “Carry me!”

“Ugh. Get off me, you dick,” Jensen grunted, rolling his shoulders back to try and shake Chad off even as he stumbled forward to keep from falling. “Don’t you have something really douchey to be doing?”

“You need better comebacks,” Chad scoffed and jumped down, bumping into Jensen’s side. “Whatcha doin’ here, mini-man? Set to stalk your lover boy?”

Jensen flushed and ducked his head down, pursing his lips in annoyance. Somewhere along the line Jared had picked up Chad as a friend and consequently, Jensen had befriended the boy as well. Only Chad seemed to somehow _know_ Jensen in a creepy, all-too-wise way and that knowledge included his epic love for Jared. Thankfully the boy hadn’t informed Jared of Jensen’s crush but that didn’t mean Jensen trusted Chad to keep it silent forever.

“Leave me alone, Chad,” Jensen grumbled and readjusted his glasses. He never felt cool enough for these kinds of parties, never had the _in style_ clothing, hadn’t hit a growth spurt recently enough to catch his height up with the other kids. He was like a shrimp in a wide open ocean were all the other fish had bright colorful spots and stripes. Or, he was exactly Jared’s opposite.

“You know Jenny, you never give me enough credit,” Chad sighed dramatically and looped his arm through Jensen’s dragging him through the mass of bodies filling the front hallway. “Why don’t you love me, little boy? I could be _so_ good to you.” 

Jensen groaned and tried to squirm away as Chad landed loud smacking kisses to his cheek. “Oh my god, I hate you! Let me go!” 

“Chad? Are you giving my boy a hard time?” Jared’s warm laughter and rich voice was pretty much the best noise Jensen had ever heard and when the boy’s hands curled around his middle and tugged him free from Chad’s hold, Jensen sank back into the familiar heat willingly. Of course, Jared’s hands felt impossibly large on his thin waist and that didn’t help the fluttering in Jensen’s ribcage. 

The smirk on Chad’s lips lingered as his gaze shifted from Jensen to Jared. “Of course not. _Your boy_ and I were just having a friendly little chat. Haven’t seen Sandy around tonight, Jay, something up?”

Jared shrugged and let his arms fall over Jensen’s shoulders to wrap around under his neck, leaning heavily against Jensen’s back. Unlike Chad nearly climbing on him, Jensen really didn’t mind Jared’s too heavy weight pressing into him. For so many obvious reasons. “She’s probably around or whatever. I wouldn’t know.”

Since Jensen couldn’t twist around to look at the expression on Jared’s face, which usually helped him read between the lines of whatever Jared was saying, Jensen watched Chad’s instead and leaned back against Jared. He loved when Jared was like this, touchy-feely, as long as he was the person being touched. Jared’s problem was he had this tendency to touch _everyone_.

Chad’s eyebrow arched which most likely meant Jared was doing his evasive, scanning around the room to feign disinterest in the conversation thing. The very idea of what _that_ meant had Jensen perking up. “You two alright?” Chad asked casually but Jensen didn’t miss the way their gazes momentarily locked. 

“We broke up,” Jared said simply and stepped back from Jensen only to drop his arm over his tense shoulders instead. “No big deal, whatever. Come on Jen, I wanna get you _wasted_. Like, more wasted then the spring break bash. So drunk you won’t even know your own name!”

Jensen stared wide eyed at Chad even as Jared dragged him, mostly willingly, further into the house. The way Jared was calling loudly at people, slapping their shoulders and laughing, suggested he’d already had a few drinks himself. But Jensen would allow Jared to get him drunk because clearly, Jared needed the drinking buddy. And there wasn’t anything he wouldn’t do for Jared.

~~

Everything was spinning. Or maybe just Jensen was. Regardless, things were definitely _weird_ and the couch Jensen sat on suddenly felt unsteady beneath him. It seemed pretty important so Jensen turned to tell Jared but... Jared was missing. And he wasn’t the other way when Jensen twisted rapidly to check. 

“I lost my Jared,” Jensen mumbled to no one and shook his head, pushing slowly up to his feet. He swayed dangerously for a moment but extending hands out to either side seemed to help so he did that for a while, letting everything stabilize. 

Once he was sure the floor wasn’t about to flip out from under him and suddenly become the ceiling, he forced himself forward a few steps. He had absolutely no idea how many drinks he’d had, how long he’d been drinking, and just what kind of things Jared was pouring in those damn red plastic cups. But tomorrow, when he was hunched over the toilet and trying to heave his stomach up through his throat, he was _really_ not gonna love Jared so much.

Currently though, most things felt pretty good. Except the losing Jared thing. He thought he could vaguely recall Jared mentioning something about going for a piss but that had been a while go, sometime after the drinks started and after Jared had ranted about how _uptight_ Sandy apparently was. Jensen wasn’t sure he wanted to know the specific details of their break-up, at least not when he was drunk and couldn’t do much to help his surely hurting best friend.

Sometimes Jared might come across as a douche or something, the all-star jock with the inflated ego, but Jensen knew him better. Jared had a heart of gold; of course he cared if he split up with his girlfriend of the past two years. He was just choosing to express that at the moment by getting very drunk. And getting Jensen very drunk too.

“Hey!” Jensen grabbed the arm of the nearest blonde but it wasn’t Chad, it was some girl, and she looked annoyed until she realized it was him. A lot of people acted that way with him. Jared was kind of a protective, older best friend. “Have you seen my Jared? I mean, Jared? Have you seen him?”

“I think I saw him go upstairs.” The girl nodded and pointed toward the stairs. “You need some help, Jensen?”

“Nah, I’m good.” Jensen smiled at the girl - both of her, there seemed to be a lot of clones in his vision - and waved before hurrying forward. “Jared! You asshole! You’re not supposed to drink me- I mean, get me drunk,” Jensen stopped halfway up the flight of stairs to giggle at his slurred words, shaking his head then forcing himself on and up once more. “Don’t leave me alone drunk! People could take advantage of me. _Chad_ could.”

There was no sign of Jared on the top landing and Jensen scratched at his forehead for a moment before shrugging and starting for the doors. The first room was empty and dark, the second was a bathroom and locked, the third had a pool table and two couples making out on top of it. Jensen snorted as he shut the door, shaking his head and crossing the hall to the other row of doors. 

Another empty bedroom. Another bedroom with the light out but this time Jensen stopped to flick the light on, because being drunk apparently didn’t give him special super powers. Light flooded across the room, illuminating two bodies rolling together on the mattress. Jensen blinked at the shirtless boys. Two boys. And heat flushed his cheeks because _whoa_. That wasn’t the type of thing you walked in on all that often.

The boy on top broke away and twisted toward him, exposing the boy beneath him, and Jensen was suddenly, completely, painfully, sober. “Jared,” he whispered, eyes wide with shook, fingers still curled hard around the doorknob.

“Fuck, Jen, get out of here!” Jared hollered and tugged the boy he was making out with, who Jensen had never seen before, closer.

“What about...” The boy mumbled around the kiss and Jensen just kept watching because he couldn’t seem to stop.

“Oh, that’s just Jensen. He’s like my kid brother,” Jared said dismissively, sliding his fingers up into the boy’s hair and holding him close. “Jen, shut the fucking door would ya? And get the lights on your way out.”

Jensen couldn’t move, couldn’t blink, could barely even _breathe_. It wasn’t supposed to be like this. Jared didn’t like boys. Because if Jared liked boys then he would be in love with Jensen. Why wouldn’t he? They knew each other better than anyone else in the world, they’d grown up together, and Jensen loved Jared with everything he had. 

“Come on, kid,” Chad’s voice was soft and right beside his ear, fingers curling around his wrist to pull his grasp from the door. 

Jensen stumbled back as Chad reached in the room, flicked the light off and shut the door. No matter how many times he stared at the door things weren’t changing and when he heard a moan that was distinctly Jared’s, the pain sliced through his chest with startling harshness.

“Jen,” Chad whispered, ducking down to catch Jensen’s eyes. “Hey, you okay?”

Years Jensen had known Chad and he’d never heard the boy sound so concerned; hell, he’d never heard the boy call him anything outside _Jenny_ no matter how often he protested. Which maybe was the final straw. Tears pricked along Jensen’s eyes, his lower lip trembling as he met the bright blue of Chad’s gaze. “I don’t... understand. Jared doesn’t. He doesn’t like guys.”

Chad sighed, fingers passing up through his hair then dropping to curl over Jensen’s shoulder. “Man, Jen, it’s just a thing. You know how he is. It’s not like he does it often. But you know, between the alcohol and breaking up with Sandy, I’m sure he’s hurting and looking for comfort.”

Jensen let Chad guide him back down the stairs, out back, not really aware of moving until he was dropping on the sidewalk, feet in the gutter. Chad’s words made about as much sense as Jared tangled with that nameless dark-haired boy on the bed and he looked over once more, trying to blink the tears away. “But, what about me? I could comfort him.”

“Fuck. Jen, come on.” Chad groaned and grabbed Jensen’s wrist, squeezing. “You don’t want to be his rebound hook up.”

“He doesn’t want me,” Jensen whispered, blinking down at his shoes until the words sank in and his gaze snapped up to Chad again. “He likes boys but he doesn’t want me. He doesn’t love me. Why doesn’t he want me like that? I could do that. I could be his rebound. I could comfort him. Why doesn’t-” The words caught in Jensen’s throat and swayed forward as Chad’s arms slid around him and tugged him forward into a hard hug.

“You don’t want that, Jensen. You don’t want to be his rebound. And _of course_ Jared loves you. He’s a fucker, yeah, and he doesn’t deserve you, but he does care. Just... in a different way.” Chad slid fingers through Jensen’s hair, groaning again a moment later. “I’m gonna kill the bastard.”

Jensen sniffed, struggling to pull himself together because crying on the curb in Chad’s arms was really, really lame. And people would see, they’d tell Jared, and Jensen didn’t know how to explain the way his heart felt so broken. “Why doesn’t he love me, Chad? Am I... gross or something?”

“Gross? You’re fucking kidding, right?” Chad pulled back and smirked at Jensen, thumbing tears from under his eyes. “If you were a girl, I’d fuck you in a heartbeat.”

A surprised laugh fell from Jensen, twisted somewhat with a half sob but well, he was trying to pull it together. “Gee, thanks.”

“Jen?” Jared was a few steps behind them, voice curious and maybe a little deeper than usual.

Jensen slowly glanced up at him, not really all that comforted by Jared’s kiss swollen lips and bed ruffled hair. The boy’s cheeks were flushed and his eyes were darker and Jensen really could have gone the rest of his life without knowing how Jared looked when he was turned on.

“Don’t you have some nameless boy to be fucking, Jay?” Chad asked, his voice harsh and cold as he stood and faced Jared.

Jared’s shoulders tensed, his eyes narrowing on instinct. “What’s your issue, Chad?”

“Just not a fan of stuck up assholes is all.” Chad stepped forward, crowding into Jared’s space and glaring up at him. 

“What the _fuck_ Chad?” Jared met the move forward, fingers curling into fists at his sides like whenever he prepared for a fight.

Jensen quickly scrambled up from the ground and tugged at Chad’s arm, slipping between the boys to spread them further apart. “Guys, stop. It’s- nothing. It’s fine. Chad’s just gonna take me home Jared, so um, you can get back to whatever.”

“Are you okay, though?” Jared grabbed his arm, dipping down to meet his gaze. “You’ve been crying.”

“Jared?” That boy, from upstairs, was calling out to Jared from the sidewalk. His shirt was unbuttoned and hanging open at his sides and Jensen’s heart plummeted even further. “You said you’d only be a minute.”

“Yeah I’m coming.” Jared smiled at the boy then turned back to Jensen. “So you’re good.”

Jensen blinked up at his best friend and took a step back, bumping into Chad’s shoulder. “Yeah. See you around Jared.” He forced himself to turn and walk away after that because well, Jared was just too much to deal with at the moment. Thank god Chad was there to take him home, Jensen was pretty sure he’d never make it on his own. 

~~~

The early morning air was warm enough Jared could get away with wearing just a t-shirt and showing off the wicked tan he’d gotten over the summer in California. One of the few good things to come from three months away. He’d mostly been bored; apparently laying around at the pool and living in a bachelor pad wasn’t so cool. His brother worked a lot and wasn’t the party animal he used to be and Jared was... lonely.

For some reason, Jensen hadn’t called at all, not even once. The night before he’d left was kind of a weird blur but he’d remembered drinking a lot, making Jensen drink a lot, then maybe something to do with Jensen crying and Chad being a douche. There was also something to do with some random boy he couldn’t remember the name of but that didn’t matter too much.

The point was, Jared had gone three months without hearing from the one person who’d been a solid in his life outside his family for his entire life. Jared was hurt by the entire thing, confused, more than a little unsure what had made Jensen ignore him all of a sudden. But now it was the first day of school and ever since Jared had gotten a car for his sixteenth birthday he’d driven Jensen to school.

So even if Jared hadn’t heard from Jensen in the couple of days since he’d been home, he stopped in front of his car and turned to Jensen’s house. Truthfully, he was pretty excited about seeing Jensen. He’d really missed the kid, missed the way he’d ramble about some book he’d watched or some History channel program that caught his interest. For so long Jared had just been used to Jensen being around, not having him kind of threw everything off.

When at least ten minutes passed without Jensen, which was weird enough considering the boy was always on time for school, Jared frowned and headed across the driveway. He’d figured if Jensen for some reason didn’t need a ride he would have at texted but another check of his phone came up empty. So he knocked on the Ackles’ front door instead, smiling when Donna answered. 

“Jared, look at you, you must have grown another five inches over the summer.” Donna smiled at him, stepping out onto the front step to lean up and kiss his cheek. “I’m gonna need a step stool to do that soon.”

Jared laughed and pulled the woman forward for a hug. She was kind of like a second mom to him really and it was just as weird not to have her around as it was not to have Jensen. Though, for different reasons Jared couldn’t name. “I’ll try and stop growing,” he promised Donna then stepped back, peering curiously into the familiar front hall of the Ackles home. “What’s up with Jen? He running late?”

Donna sighed in that way she used to when they were younger and got caught playing in the mud in their dress clothes. Which never meant good things. “Jensen stayed the night at Chad’s last night, where he’s been most of the summer. I’m just not sure what’s gotten into that boy.”

A frown tugged at Jared’s lips and something pinched in his chest but he shook it off, taking another step back. “Really? Huh. Well, I’ll just hunt him down at school. He’s um... he’s okay, right?”

“Oh Jared, I really don’t know.” Donna sighed and gave Jared a sad smile before patting his shoulder and turning toward the house. “Have a good day at school honey, and if you could convince my son to ride home with you afterwards, I’d appreciate it.”

Jared nodded and forced a smile for Donna’s sake, not wanting her to know how concerned he was for Jensen’s sake. Chad wasn’t a bad guy but he certainly wasn’t all pure and innocent. It was one thing for Jensen to drink when Jared was there to look after him but who knew what kind of trouble Chad could get Jensen into while Jared was elsewhere. The idea alone had him turning with only a wave to Donna and half jogging to his car. 

He’d find Jensen at school and make sure the kid was okay. Then he’d tear Chad a new one for doing whatever it was he’d likely done to Jensen over the summer. 

~~~

The thing about being popular was, people all tended to pretend like they knew you. Which meant on the first day of school nearly everyone was stopping you to say hi and ask how your summer was. As a result, it took Jared nearly ten minutes to get just through the parking lot, which was annoying because he just wanted to hunt down Jensen. He was secretly praying Chad hadn’t done something to forever scar his geeky, innocent little best friend. 

He spotted Chad first, standing in a small group of people and laughing on the front lawn. Jared blew out a relieved breath, gaze sweeping around the nearby people to spot some sign of Jensen. There was a tall boy by Chad’s side, almost his height but not quite, with a dark leather coat and spiky brown hair, and some girls in front of them, but no Jensen. Maybe he’d already gone to class.

Jared approached Chad from behind and greeted him with a punch to the shoulder. “Chad, man, I’ve been looking for you. Have you seen Jen-” Jared cut off as both boys turned and apparently, tall boy with the leather coat _was_ Jensen. At least, Jared was pretty sure that was Jensen. Same bright green eyes and freckled cheeks but there were no wire frames balanced on his nose and his full lower lip was adorned with a shiny black metal ring. 

Jared’s gaze flickered quickly over the boy’s features, trying to take in and absorb all the sudden differences. Both ears were pierced, and his eyebrow and lip, and Jared could see dark ink just beneath the collar of the leather jacket, crawling up Jensen’s neck like it was alive or something. The boy was wearing an impossibly tight white shirt beneath his jacket and loose denims that hung low enough Jared could see the top of his hipbones as his gaze dropped down. 

_Holy shit_. Apparently Chad had not only scarred his poor innocent little Jensen, he’d turned him into some type of fifteen year-old twink or something. Like a wannabe hooker. Or something else really dirty that made heat crawl through Jared at a pace that was more than a little terrifying. “Jensen,” he breathed in shock, forcing his gaze back up to those narrowed green eyes. “What the hell happened to you?”

Jensen snorted a laugh that sounded not at all amused and maybe mostly annoyed and made Jared’s stomach churn. “Gee Jared, nice to see you too.”

“Ah give him a break Jen, he spent three months in Cali. His brain is probably smog mush or something.” Chad laughed and dropped his arm over Jensen’s shoulder, tugging him flush to his side. “Can we help you with something, Jared or would you just like to stare for a while? I’m sure Jensen would love putting on some type of show for you.”

“As if,” Jensen huffed, rolling his eyes and leaning just slightly into Chad’s side. “I have a million better things to do with my day.”

Jared’s mouth opened, closed, opened and stayed that way for a while. He felt a little like he’d just been tackled by a three hundred pound line backer or something. This was _Jensen_ , the boy Jared had grown up with, the one who’d read the entire Lord of the Rings trilogy by the time he was ten and had spent weeks on end making Jared pretend to be Hobbits traveling through Middle Earth to destroy some powerful magic ring. Only he wasn’t, he was this Jensen, with piercings and some crazy ass tattoo, and a look that held something a lot like anger and annoyance.

All the pieces weren’t adding up in Jared’s mind but he forced words to come back because Chad was starting to tug Jensen away, toward the school, and Jared needed to figure shit out before it was too late. His hand snapped out and grabbed Jensen’s arm, effectively stopping the boy in place. “What’s going on? What’s happened to you?”

Jensen turned slowly toward him, looking pointedly down at Jared’s hand curled around his forearm then back up. “Like you even fucking care, Jared.” Jensen’s words were nearly a hissed and he reached out with his free hand, peeling Jared’s grasp from him. “Don’t you have some cheerleader to fuck or something?”

“But, Jen-”

“Oh and Jared?” Jensen interrupted him swiftly, turning to face him and taking a step closer. He was still shorter then Jared but he’d definitely grown over the summer, using the height to his advantage as he glared up at Jared. “Touch me again and I’ll fuckin’ punch you, got it?”

“What the fuck,” Jared gasped as he stumbled back a step, rubbing at his chest as if Jensen had shoved him. He hadn’t, he hadn’t laid a finger on Jared, but the force of his words was like a physical blow that left Jared feeling dizzy and a little sick.

He watched as Jensen shot him a final glare then turned, stalking off for the school building, Chad lingering a beat longer before jogging after him. Jared was rooted to the spot, more confused then he’d been that morning when Jensen hadn’t turned up, and a little scared for the first time that summer that he’d really, truly, lost the best friend he’d ever had. And he wasn’t even sure _why_.

~~

“Oh my god,” Jensen whispered, pacing across the classroom as Chad shut the door and dropped heavily back against it with a laugh.

“Dude, that was fucking _incredible_.” Chad slapped his hand on the door. When Jensen turned back to him, he wasn’t all that surprised to see him grinning. “You sure put the smug bastard in his place.”

Jensen frowned and rubbed along his neck. He was trying not to scratch, everyone told him not to, but the damn thing kept tingling all weird. And well, it was better to focus on that then the look that had been on Jared’s face a few minutes before. “He... I think I really hurt him, Chad. He looked shocked and _hurt_.”

“And you shouldn’t care,” Chad pointed out, shoving off the door and crossing to him. “You were hurt, Jensen, you were fucking _crying_ and what did he do?”

“He came out to see if I was okay,” Jensen whispered and ducked his head down. They’d had this argument a million times over the summer, they’d replayed the entire scene over and over to the point it only barely hurt to think of now. Just that small little pinch in his heart that Jensen thought might always be there. “He did come after me.”

“And even though you clearly weren’t, he still ditched you to hook up with some random guy. Come on, Jen, I thought we were getting past this. You’re not that same kid and Jared can go find himself a different sidekick to tag along at his asshole heels.”

Jensen’s lips twitched in a smile as he leaned into Chad’s arm hooking over his shoulder. “That doesn’t even make sense,” he muttered and punched Chad’s side lightly. He didn’t tell Chad how much he missed Jared, how he really hadn’t minded being the tag-along sidekick, because there was never anything quite like Jared’s smile when it was aimed at him alone. No one could make him feel like Jared did, nothing else would compare - he knew, because he’d tried all summer to find that feeling with each piercing, each needle of ink to his skin, each drink of alcohol. 

The only thing he hadn’t tried was hooking up with someone else, not that Chad hadn’t encouraged him, but it was a line he just couldn’t get himself to cross. Maybe soon though. Now that Jared was back, now that Jensen would see him in the halls and in classrooms, it wouldn’t be long before it would become too much. Jared would probably get himself a new girlfriend soon, hopefully not a boyfriend, Jensen didn’t think he could handle that at all. So Jared would continue his perfect life and reaffirm what Jensen knew, that he didn’t want Jensen. And maybe then Jensen would finally be ready to have his own style of a hook up.

“Come on, let’s ditch first hour and go smoke under the bleachers.” Chad dragged him out of the classroom once more. And Jensen tagged along because he was good at that, and at least Chad never made him feel like his heart was being smashed into a million little pieces. 

~~~

No matter how much Jared searched throughout the day for Jensen and Chad, he couldn’t seem to track the boys down again. Last year, when Jensen had been a nervous freshman in a brand new school, Jared had walked with him to every class for the first week. Now it seemed like Jensen knew the school better than Jared did, either that or he wasn’t even there because Jared was sure he’d searched down every hallway.

He didn’t even know what classes Jensen had, which felt so weird. And they didn’t eat lunch together like they had every day the year before. People had always been nice to Jensen he thought, and maybe a lot of that had to do with Jared being so popular, but it wasn’t like the kid wasn’t equally awesome. He was just a bit of a geek too. 

Jared ate lunch with most of the team and tried to scan every face in the cafeteria but wherever Jensen and his new BFF were, it wasn’t there. And what the fuck was with _that_ anyway? What had Chad said to get Jensen to turn into this, crazy punk, wannabe bad ass kid? What else had Chad convinced Jensen to do? Was Jensen’s life in danger?

Of course it was. Chad was crazy. For all Jared knew, Jensen had been brainwashed or something. And okay, that was probably ridiculous to think but Chad wasn’t stupid, he was like an evil mastermind. He was probably getting Jensen to rob banks with him on the weekends or something.

“Padalecki, get your ass on the field!” Coach Beaver called from across the field and Jared huffed, clutching his helmet tighter and half jogging on to the field.

At least practice would give him something else to think about for a while. He was a bit worn out from worrying about Jensen all day and as much as he wanted to just talk to the boy and figure things out, he’d take the distraction of familiar plays and miles of grass beneath his cleats. 

Thinking that was probably the reason everything got all screwed up again. Because Jared’s gaze was caught by the sun hitting a flash of metal and he glanced up at the top row of bleachers as he continued his slow jog. And there was Jensen, with Chad, leaning back against the top rail. This time he wasn’t wearing his leather jacket. The tight white shirt he wore was rucked up slightly, molding along his skin, but Jared was caught more on the dark tribal marks of the tattoo that were curling out just under the cut off sleeve.

Jared tripped on his shoes and stumbled a moment, barely managing to straighten himself before he face planted. With the sun beating down on him, Jensen’s head tipped back to soak in the heat or something, his hips slightly jutted out and suggestive, it was the fucking hottest thing Jared had ever seen. And Jared learned exactly why getting a hard-on with an athletic cup was never a good idea.

Then, as Jared watched, Jensen lifted his hand and brought a cigarette to his mouth and that time he came even closer to face planting. Jensen. Smoking. _Smoking_. That was about enough for Jared. He was going to _murder_ Chad for ruining Jensen’s sweet little pureness. Except maybe not for the tattoo and piercing thing because well, that was hot.

Ignoring the bellowing call of his Coach Jared turned and sprinted to the bleachers, not in the least bit slowed by the padding he wore. He’d gotten adjusted to the football attire and he took the steps of the bleachers two at a time, not stopping until he was right in front of Jensen. Reaching out he snatched the cigarette from the boy’s fingers and dropped it, toeing it out easily.

“What the fuck is your issue?” Jared spat, narrowing his eyes first at Chad then back at Jensen. 

“My issue?” Jensen’s eyebrows rose, the black bar lifting with it, and pushed off the back of the stands. “What did I say about touching me, asshole?”

Jared’s brows pulled together in confusion, his lips shifting down in a deep frown. “Why are you so angry with me? What has Chad done to you?”

“Me? You douche-”

“Chad has nothing to do with this,” Jensen swiftly interrupted, pushing forward into Jared’s space like he had that morning. “Chad has been the one to support me, be with me, the entire summer. You didn’t even call. You don’t even _care_. So don’t get all up in my face like you have any right to be protective of me.”

Jared’s jaw dropped as he stared down at Jensen, shocked by his words. He’d never thought he was the one behind Jensen’s whole, meltdown or whatever. Why would he be behind it? What could he have done? “I don’t understand.”

“Yeah, Jared, that’s the point. You never do.” Jensen rolled his eyes and brushed hard past him, knocking into his shoulder and starting down the steps.

Jared spun, blinking rapidly a few times to clear his vision and the surprising, dizzying blur. “Jen, wait, come on.”

“Stop calling me that, Jared, it’s a nickname only reserved for friends,” Jensen spoke over his shoulder, pausing halfway down the steps. “Chad? You coming?”

“Yeah, _Jen_ , I am.” Chad shot Jared a smirk and flicked his own cigarette over the back of the steps, jogging down to catch up with Jensen and finish their journey down the steps.

Jared was left staring once more as Jensen and Chad walked off. That sinking in his heart wasn’t stopping and Jared was starting to get a bad feeling about the entire thing. 

~~

“Jensen, I need you to run this over to Sherri,” Donna called from down the hall, clattering something in the kitchen a moment later. 

Jensen, who was halfway to the safety of his bedroom, froze. The very prospect of going over to the Padalecki’s for any reason had Jensen’s stomach rolling unpleasantly. For the last week he’d been dodging Jared left and right at school. Sometimes he’d look up, catch Jared’s eyes on him, but he always turned away before anything could happen.

The last thing he needed was Jared pretending he really gave a damn, like he ever really did. Because, if he had, then he would have called over the summer. He wouldn’t have ditched Jensen at the party. He never would have looked at any boy but Jensen.

“Jensen? Do you hear me?” Donna called once more and sighed, stepping to the entry way of the kitchen and peering down at him. It was that _mom look_ he’d been getting all summer. Jensen supposed he was just lucky they hadn’t seen his tattoos yet. “I said I need you to take this dish over to Sherri’s.”

“I was going to Chad’s.” Jensen shrugged, taking a step back from the offered dish.

“You’re over there all the time. I think you can spend a night away from Chad,” Donna sighed and shook her head. “Maybe you should spend some time with Jared. He was gone all summer and he used to be such a good influence on you.”

Jensen eyed his mother, knowing that arguing wasn’t really going to get him very far. The last thing he wanted was another lecture about how he was _throwing his life away_. Apparently his parents seemed to think a couple of piercings meant he was tumbling head over heels down the dark side or something.

“You don’t know Jared like you think you do, mom,” Jensen said quietly, meeting his mom’s gaze as he took the dish and turned. He’d rather just drop off the dish with Sherri and book it. The last thing he needed was some kind of encounter with Jared. Especially since Chad wasn’t even there to back him up. 

Before Donna could say anything more Jensen nearly stormed from the house, slamming the door behind him and jumping over the row of flowers that separated their yards. He kept his gaze down as he walked up the familiar walkway, clutching the dish tight in his fingers and finally jamming his elbow into the doorbell. Any other day, a few months before, and Jensen just would have walked in. 

The door opened and Jensen stared down at familiar white tennis shoes before blowing out a painful, slow breath. Why couldn’t he be out with one of his perfect cheerleaders or slut-like boy toys? 

“Jen... sen,” Jared’s tone was definitely laced with shock, probably because Jensen had been like a skittish mouse around Jared all week. “Um, hey. How’s it going?”

Jensen looked up, watching as Jared rested his hip against the door and considered him. “Fine. My mom said this is your mom’s.” Jensen held the dish out, arching his brow when Jared just continued to stare. “Wearing your cups a little tight lately Jared? That means fuckin’ take the dish.”

“God, you’re bitchy,” Jared huffed, reaching out to take the dish and pull it close. “Come on in, hang out a while.”

“I’d rather not.” Jensen stepped back, forcing himself to turn because well, Jared just looked too damn hot leaning all casual against the door like a porn star or something else Chad would say. Jensen was still learning those terms.

“Jensen, come on,” Jared sighed and it sounded weary, worn out, like this whole thing was making him feel... awful.

Which Jensen couldn’t really wrap his mind around. Because how could Jared _really_ care if he’d been so quick to dismiss Jensen months before? All summer long, not a single word, it had been a pretty clear message to Jensen. “What is it you wan,t Jared? Because I’m not really up for being your geeky little sidekick anymore. You miss having someone tagging along that makes you look better? Not getting laid as easily without your poor, helpless, geeky little shadow?”

“Jesus _fuck_ Jensen, is that really what you think? Is that how you think I saw you?” Jared dragged his fingers up through his hair and Jensen watched it flutter back into place. It was longer, weirdly more golden like the California sun had brightened the locks somehow. It was a little painful to watch really. “You’re my best friend.”

“Oh really? Is that what I am?” Jensen snorted a painfully harsh laugh and shook his head. “So, I’m the best friend that you’re just okay ditching even when you know I’m upset? I’m the best friend you got drunk then left alone to go hook up with some random guy you probably can’t even name now? I’m the _best friend_ that you never want-” 

It was a miracle Jensen managed to cut himself off before he spilled all his dirty little secrets right there on Jared’s front door step. There was the possibility that he didn’t need to spell it all out, despite what Jensen suggested before, Jared was pretty damn smart and he knew Jensen. Better than anyone really. That look on his face definitely suggested he knew _something_ more than he had before. 

“So you’re like this now... with the piercings and the tattoos, because of me.” It was a statement, Jared’s words a little flat and hollow. “I did this to you.”

“Oh my god, he’s managed to use his brain to puzzle something out. Let’s note this day in history. The headlines can say, super asshole jock uses one percent mental capabilities, scientists marvel.” Jensen waved his hands about at his sides, dropping them a moment later with a heavy whoosh. “How’s your head? Did that hurt?”

“Fuck man, you’ve been spending too much time with Chad.” There was something like the hint of laughter to Jared’s words and the boy stepped closer, reaching out to thumb along Jensen’s collar. “You know, if I really am responsible for this new look, I should probably be thanked.”

Jensen shot him a decidedly unheated look. It was supposed to be a glare but Jared was kind of really close, and Jensen could smell his cologne. It was familiar in a painful way; Jensen had missed it. “You want a medal or something?” It wasn’t really the scathing remark he’d intended but he managed more of a glare so that was something.

Of course, Jared only smirked and let his thumb drag along the upper curve of black ink just under the jacket collar. “Your parents seen those yet? Man, they had to have freaked.”

“They haven’t.” Jensen was losing his battle on not speaking with Jared. He’d told Chad he wouldn’t, that he was strong enough to resist the pull, but with Jared right there in front of him and Chad nowhere in sight, Jensen wasn’t. “Though my mom cried after the piercing thing.”

“Personally, I think they look good on you.” Jared ducked down, his lips brushing along the edge of Jensen’s ear, his grip tightening on the leather collar of Jensen’s coat. “I think you look fuckin’ hot as hell Jen. I’m sorry I hurt you, didn’t mean to, but maybe you could some inside and we could talk? You could tell me all about what I did.”

Heat boiled just under Jensen’s skin, bringing a flush to his cheeks, causing his breath to hitch in his chest. He was swaying into Jared out of his control, every inch of him tingling. “I- I won’t be some easy lay for you Jared. Forget that. I’m not _yours_.”

“But you could be,” Jared said easily, with a level of confidence Jensen had heard from him a million times before. 

When he spoke about games and plays, girls and whores, little trophies he could add to his belt notch or whatever. Jensen would _not_ be that. As much as he’d love to give it up for Jared - and probably would, in a heartbeat - he couldn’t be that thing so easily dismissed once it was used up. So he broke away from Jared and stepped back, praying the arousal in his jeans wasn’t too obvious. “Go find someone else to fuck, Jared. If all you want is someone with tattoos and piercings then I’m sure you can find it elsewhere.”

“What if I just want you?” Jared asked quietly but he didn’t step forward. Instead he slid back a step and tucked his hands into his pockets, eyeing Jensen like a lion would eye his next meal. “Maybe I just want to explore your tattoos.”

“Well then, you better get used to not getting what you want.” It was a pretty lame comeback and Jensen huffed, spinning on his Converses and heading back down the walkway. The sooner he got away from Jared, the better.

“I always get what I want, Jensen!” Jared called after him and Jensen quickened his steps, ignoring the way Jared was laughing and the heat that still crawled through him. 

~~

Jensen was irritated. It was understandable, really, considering Jared had been this constant nagging presence over the last couple of weeks and Jensen couldn’t seem to escape him. Sure he ignored the boy, blew him off, shot back as many snarky, scathing remarks as he could, but Jared wasn’t easily dissuaded. Jensen already knew this about him. Especially when the boy felt like there was something he wanted and it was being denied of him, he’d do whatever it took to get it.

Chad kept telling Jensen to stay tough, ride it out, kept saying how proud of Jensen he was. Of course, Chad couldn’t possibly know how hard it was to resist when Jared’s gaze darkened on him, cheeks flushing, that heady look of lust Jensen had seen on Jared’s face before but only directed at others. It was enough to drive Jensen a little crazy, especially at night when he laid in bed and thought about Jared imagining him like that. 

But he wasn’t an idiot. He knew those looks would burn away the moment Jensen gave into him. That fact alone was the only thing keeping Jensen back some days. Because being cast aside like that? After having Jared? It would probably kill him. 

All these things were piling up in him, adding up and tangling together, and Jensen blew off Chad that Friday night because he wasn’t up for hanging out with anyone. He felt on edge, testy, and the safety of his dark bedroom seemed a much wiser place to spend his time. The weekend before he’d added the last little bit of his tattoo at the base of his spine; it was still kind of sore, which was really the only welcome distraction to Jared and all the crap he couldn’t seem to get over.

Jensen wasn’t trying to being some melodramatic teenager as he sat in his room in the dark, staring at the opposite wall. Maybe he was just taking the time to figure shit out. It wasn’t easy to have one best friend your entire life and suddenly lose him over the course of a summer and then have him not really care about getting that friendship back. No, all he wanted was Jensen’s body, the one that had been marked and pierced, like some type of trophy. 

When the light in the house next to his turned on it flooded through Jensen’s window, spreading out across his feet. It sent tension rolling across his spine and his eyes fell closed. It wasn’t like Jared would know he was sitting there in the dark, not at all moping. Why Jared was home on a Friday evening Jensen wasn’t sure. Usually Jared always went to some party after practice when there wasn’t a game. 

Rising slowly, Jensen crossed his room and leaned against the window seal. He could see Jared crossing his room, dropping his sports bag, slipping off his coat. So many years Jensen had watched Jared in his room, watching TV or playing X-box or just laying around, and it had never felt weird. In that moment though he felt like a spy or a perv or something. Because Jared was pulling off his shirt and Jensen could see miles of smooth flesh. 

For a moment Jared’s gaze flickered up to him and Jensen reflexively stepped back, shrinking further into the shadows. There was no way Jared knew he was there, but the boy slowly stepped forward, coming to a stop directly in front of the window, and he didn’t tear his gaze away. Jensen stared because turning away wasn’t a possibility, not even as Jared dragged his thumb down the middle of his chest, circling his belly button then slipping further down. 

Jared continued to stare his way with confidence, like he knew Jensen was there and watching, like he knew Jensen couldn’t possibly tear his gaze away. The boy’s thumb slid across the fine trial of hair to his jean button and the air hitched painfully in Jensen’s chest. The moment Jared’s thumb flicked open the button on the loose denim Jensen stepped forward, into the faint light spilling between their houses and casting a soft glow in Jensen’s room. 

There was something like a knowing smile on Jared’s features but Jensen only spared a moment to glance at it. Instead his gaze was focused more on the slow drag of the zipper being tugged down, Jared’s fingers moving with a steady confidence Jensen was sure he’d been born with. As Jared’s fingers slipped under the top of his boxers Jensen lifted a hand, pressing it flat against the cooling window in front of him. 

He wanted to turn away, wanted to flip Jared off and roll his eyes and make it clear this wasn’t doing anything to him. Only he wanted to watch more, he wanted to see Jared’s fingers curl around his cock, and a moment later that was exactly what happened. Jared used his forearm to push down his boxers and free his cock and Jensen clenched his teeth to keep his jaw from opening. 

There was at least fifteen feet separating them, two windows, a yard and fence and the stupid rose bushes both their mothers had planted to bring up the value of their property. But Jensen swore he could almost hear Jared soft moan as his lips parted with the slow roll of his hips into the loose curl of his fingers. Jensen sucked in a painful breath, unable to tear his gaze from the steady fuck upwards of Jared’s hips.

His fingers pressed near painfully hard into the window, his lips parted in a soft pant, and he didn’t look up from the red swollen flush of Jared’s cock because he didn’t want to see the sure-to-be satisfied smirk on Jared’s lips. So he kept his eyes locked on each slide of Jared’s fingers, the slow twist-stroke-drag of his fingers, the steady roll thrust of his hips as he picked up speed. 

Jensen refused to drop his hand down to his own pressing arousal, refused to let Jared see just how turned on he was. It was bad enough the boy knew he was watching really but Jensen just couldn’t make himself strong enough to turn away like he knew he should. Chad would completely fucking lose it if he knew how Jensen was giving in to temptation in such a way. But how could he not watch? As Jared’s fist quickened, Jensen’s body began to buzz, the pleasure almost too intense for Jensen to ignore. 

Jared stepped in closer to the window, his free hand pressing to the glass, his forehead dropping to rest against it a moment later. His mouth moved slowly and Jensen thought, maybe, that might have been his name on the boy’s lips. Jensen’s brain couldn’t wrap around this, why Jared was messing with him in such a way, but he figured it was likely just another of Jared’s techniques.

He wasn’t used to having to work so hard to get someone. Obviously Jared saw Jensen as an ultimate challenge and he was stepping up his play. Jensen was distracted for just a moment by the flush on Jared’s cheeks but the steady thrust of the boy’s hips was picking up speed and Jensen’s gaze rapidly dropped, lingering on the shiny tip of Jared’s cock as it disappeared under the brush of his thumb. 

Then Jared was coming, the splash of white landing against the window, and all the air seized in Jensen’s lungs. He nearly came in his jeans right there, just from watching, and his hand shook as he dropped it from the window. Jared was panting against the window, the glass around him steaming up then fading every few seconds. 

Jensen stepped back, his gaze fixed on Jared even as the boy’s eyes slowly lifted to meet his. Jensen expected a smirk, or that knowing smile, something that told him Jared knew it was a victory. But the boy simply stared and Jensen’s heart lodged in his throat. It was like some type of moment and he couldn’t name it, didn’t want to. Instead he reached out and grasped the string for the blinds, tugging hard and letting it slowly drop, almost relieved when Jared’s body vanished from sight.

He nearly stumbled to his bed, so hard it was painful. Something sharp pricked along his eyelids and Jensen refused to acknowledge the maybe-tears as he dropped down on his mattress and shoved his hands under his jeans. So many times in the past he’d got himself off thinking about Jared, imagining those fingers roaming over his skin, but it had never felt like this before. 

Falling back on the bed, Jensen stroked over his cock and wrestled with that part of him that was nagging _wrong, wrong, wrong_. Jared didn’t want him, not really, he was trying to _get_ him because he felt like he had to - especially knowing what a challenge it was. But god, Jensen wanted Jared. He wanted to touch every inch of him, wanted those hands mapping along the endless miles of creamy smooth skin. 

Jensen kicked off his jeans and let his fingertips stroke over his cock, teasing the sensitive skin. One hand lifted and his finger slipped between his lips, parting to suck the digit in full and soak the skin with spit. As he thought of Jared’s lips on his skin his hand dropped once more and circled his hole, inching forward to slip just inside the tight muscle. It wasn’t like he hadn’t touched himself like this before, and thought about Jared as he did so, but those images of Jared getting himself off were still so fresh in his mind. 

As his finger slid slowly up into his tight entrance Jensen rocked back, trying to imagine Jared’s fingers inside him instead. What would it really hurt if Jensen gave in? If he spread his legs for Jared? Jared’s fingers would fill him so richly, spreading him further apart, reaching deeper to touch every inch of him. Then he’d pull those fingers back and would thrust deep into him with his cock, stretching him even wider, and Jensen would be connected in that one way he’d always longed for with Jared.

Just the thought alone had his fingers picking up speed, the grip on his cock tightening, the fingers inside him twisting to plunge deeper. He just barely grazed that spot up in him that had his hips snapping up, his orgasm already sparking up through him. As he came he thought of the look on Jared’s face as he hit his own release, imagined the boy’s deep tone as he moaned Jensen’s name. 

Jensen slumped down on the mattress, still panting, still buzzing from his release. The swell of _want_ though hadn’t eased with his release. He wanted Jared even more. He wanted Jared to want _him_. Even as he knew Jared would never want the real him, wouldn’t love and care for the same way, Jensen’s desire wasn’t waning. 

Pursing his lips, Jensen rolled over and grabbed his phone, hitting Chad’s name in his contacts and pressing his phone against his ear. 

“Jen? Thought you were going hermit on me tonight,” Chad laughed into the line and Jensen hiccuped on half a sob. “Aw shit, what happened?”

“Just... Jared.” That was probably answer enough.


	2. Chapter 2

“You’re a real fuckin’ piece of work, you know that, right?”

Chad’s voice was cold and harsh in a way Jared had never really heard it before and his steps slowed, fingers curling into the straps on his backpack as he turned to face his friend. Or, once friend as it was. Ever since he’d come back from California and school started up again, Chad and he weren’t exactly on speaking terms. Instead for the last month Jared had watched Chad stick to Jensen’s side like an unpleasant growth with a bad temper. 

Jared wasn’t really in the mood for a snark battle with Chad, especially if Jensen wasn’t at least there for something nice to look at. “What the hell did I even do to you, Chad? Do you even know? Or have you finally just succumbed to jealousy because you’ve always wanted to _be_ me?”

“You fucking wish,” Chad spat and pushed off the wall, shoving Jared’s shoulder a beat later. “It must hurt, having your head shoved so far up your ass.”

“Hilarious.” Jared rolled his eyes and resisted the urge to rub at his shoulders and the lingering ache of Chad’s hard touch. “Seriously. What the hell did I do that has you acting like this? You’ve always been a douche but never really to me. You wanna explain it?”

“Are you _seriously_ this fucking retarded?” Chad huffed, arms flailing out hard enough to smack Jared’s chest again. “What’s wrong with your brain? Those other players smack you in the head too many times or something? Your mama drop you one too many times as a kid?”

“Hey now, no need to bring my mama into this conversation,” Jared muttered, trying to sound more defensive and annoyed than hurt and unsure. Between Chad and Jensen, Jared was going to get some kind of complex or something.

“Jensen. Come on Jared, put the pieces together, use the tiny little part of your brain that I know can work.” Chad reached out to tap two fingers against Jared’s temple, groaning when Jared simply stared at him. “ _Jensen_.”

Of course, Jared had already known this whole thing came down to Jensen. No matter what Chad seemed to think, Jared wasn’t _that_ dumb. But whatever pieces he was supposed to be putting into place weren’t lining up. “What? Like, the him being hurt because I ditched him thing? I’ve done it a million times, I’ve tried to apologize, and I offered plenty of other ways to make things better. Not my fault if he’s not interested.” Actually, Jared was a little hurt by the way Jensen kept brushing him off but he wasn’t gonna tell _Chad_ that. 

“He’s in love with you!” Chad nearly yelled the words, causing a few people passing by to look curiously over at them. Jared stared, his eyes wide as Chad’s hands dropped and he laughed in disbelief. “You really didn’t know? Are you fucking kidding me?”

“But... he’s... we’re best friends,” Jared whispered, trying to sort out Chad’s words, force them to make sense. Jensen. _In love with him._

Surprisingly, the expression on Chad’s face softened. “Yeah, you were. He’s had a thing for you for years Jared but he thought, you were straight, dating Sandy, he dealt with it. Then the end of year party and he saw-”

“Me with that boy,” Jared filled in and yeah, the pieces were suddenly lining up a lot quicker. That night, no matter how drunk he was, he could still remember. Jensen had sounded so shocked when he’d found Jared with that boy in the guest room, which was part of the reason Jared had gone to check up on him. He’d thought at the time that maybe Jensen was having issues with the whole _gay_ \- or well, bi, - thing. 

Apparently, he’d been way off base. And that expression on Chad’s face hardened once more. “Just imagine how he felt to learn the boy he was in love with wasn’t so straight. He was crushed, Jared. Then you came out there and I know you knew he was upset but you still hurried off to hook up with whoever that asshole was.”

“And so he changed himself? The tattoos and piercings, he really did do all that because I... I broke his heart?” Jared stumbled back until he could lean against the wall, like the weight of this conversation alone was breaking down all his strength. He blinked a few times and looked over at Chad. “I turned him into this... cold little bastard he’s become?”

“Shut up fucker,” Chad snapped, punching Jared’s arm. “He’s not cold and he’s definitely not a bastard! He’s... Jesus, you don’t even know anything about him. You’ve spent your whole life taking advantage of the fact that Jensen was always around, that he’d follow you wherever. You never even stopped to notice how great he truly is.”

Jared bit down on his lip for a moment then looked over at Chad, unable to deny just how right Chad was. “You’re not... you don’t like him, do you?”

Chad stared for a moment then laughed. “God, no, I don’t do dicks. But I _like_ him, you know, like the awesome brother I’ve never had or something.”

“You have four brothers,” Jared pointed out quietly, possibly still a little shocked.

“That’s beside the point. Jensen is awesome. He’s funny and hella smart and for some stupid reason, he’s still ridiculously hung up on you. He deserves someone a million times better than you but since I can’t get him to see that, maybe I can knock some sense into your stupid jock brain.” Chad shrugged and folded his arms over his chest. “So, how do you feel about him? Because if you think I’m just gonna let you fuck him and toss him to the side then you’ve got another think coming.”

“And who decided you get to make that choice?” Jared shot back before he could think better of it. It was easier to be defensive and Chad was being a dick. This was a lot to absorb and Jared needed some time to really take it all in. When Chad just raised his brows in disbelief Jared groaned and let his head drop back against the wall. “Are you seriously asking if I’m in love with him or something? Because, god, Chad, up until five minutes ago I didn’t even know how deep his feelings went. I can’t just... magically feel that way.”

“I think you already do. I think it’s why you’re trying so hard to seduce him. You want him around again, you miss him. And you obviously think he’s fucking hot which, I’m straight and I can say he is so you’re right there.” Chad shrugged and stepped back. “Maybe you’ll figure your shit out and get him back. But you better be begging for forgiveness on your hands and knees and then some. Because you’re gonna have to work your fucking ass off to be worth having someone like Jensen in your life again.”

Jared swallowed thickly, staring at Chad until he couldn’t take anymore. It was obvious how serious the blonde was, possibly more serious than Jared had ever seen him, and he was maybe just a little nervous. How could he possibly win Jensen back after he’d broken his heart? And was Chad right? Could he really be _in love_ with Jensen? Up until a few minutes ago Jared was pretty sure no teenager could really even _feel_ love. 

“I’ll try,” Jared whispered and it was the best he could do at the moment. Chad would just have to be okay with that. 

~~

It was too damn early. Jensen didn’t used to have a problem getting up and getting ready for school but this sleepless nights thing was kind of killing him. Things were supposed to get better once Jared wasn’t part of his life anymore; he was supposed to be able to handle seeing him with the confidence that he wasn’t that geeky little boy who trailed along at his heels. Now though, all he could think about was Jared, worse than it ever had been before, because he was the very reason they weren’t anything. 

Sure, that something would be a random hook up until Jared got tired of him and tossed him aside but at least for the moment he would be Jensen’s. And he’d forever get to say he lost his virginity to the man he was still in love with, so at least there was that. But how could Jensen possibly move on after Jared already had? It was putting Jensen at risk of having his heart broken all over again. 

And really, going through all these thoughts all over again as he waited for Chad to pick him up was exhausting. Why couldn’t he get his brain to shut up for a few minutes?

“Need a ride?” Wouldn’t it just figure that there was Jared, sounding bright and cheerful despite the early hour. 

Jensen blinked out at the street a couple of times, then half twisted, glancing over at Jared. The early morning sun was catching along random strands in his honey golden hair, lighting it up, and nearly sparkling. He was fucking gorgeous and it wasn’t even eight AM. Fucker. “I’m waiting for Chad,” Jensen said simply and turned back, tugging his phone from his pocket just to have something else to look at it. 

“You sure? I mean, I’m here already.” There was a shrug with Jared’s words, Jensen didn’t even have to look back at Jared to know that much. 

“No I-” Jensen cut off as his phone beeped. It was a message from Chad, about damn time, and he lifted it up to show Jared. “Chad, see?”

Only when he lowered the phone the message said, _can’t make it this morning_ and Jensen’s heart kind of sank. Damn Chad. Of all the mornings he chose not to show up, why did it have to be the one in which Jared was there to witness the whole thing? “Problems?” Jared asked quietly, stepping toward him. 

Jensen frowned at his phone then looked up, expecting to see a smirk on Jared’s face. There wasn’t one, just a familiar, warm smile and Jensen’s heart fluttered against his control. “Chad can’t pick me up,” he said though he hadn’t really meant to. Damn Jared for always have some weird subconscious power over him.

“Bummer. Well then, looks like you can use a ride. Get in.” Jared turned back to his car and tugged the door open, climbing behind the wheel and not leaving Jensen much choice but to follow. 

Or walk the near twenty miles to school. And a big _fuck no_ to that. “Fine,” Jensen grumbled even though Jared had already shut his door. 

Trying not to sigh too heavily, or bounce over to the car excitedly, Jensen crossed slowly to the passenger side and tugged the door open, dropping heavily down in the seat. He hadn’t been in Jared’s car for months but it was exactly the same, smelled the same, just like Jared. It made everything in Jensen tighten and twist unpleasantly and he turned his gaze out the window, trying to pretend like it didn’t hurt just to be sitting there.

It was silent as they began their drive, the route just as familiar as everything else, like Jared humming along with Modest Mouse playing on the stereo. Jensen sank further down in the seat, focusing on hating Chad because thinking about being stuck in the car with Jared for any length of time was maddening. 

“Jen,” Jared said quietly when they were more than halfway there and Jensen tensed. “I just wanted to apologize. I... I didn’t even realize how I’d hurt you, I didn’t know how much I meant to you.”

Jensen frowned and slowly turned to look at Jared, blinking a few times like that would somehow give some logic to Jared’s words. Talk about coming out of left field. The last Jensen knew, Jared had been _proud_ of being responsible for Jensen’s transformation. And what the hell did he know about how Jensen felt about him? “What are you talking about?”

Jared sighed, shifting one hand on the wheel and slipping the other up through his hair in that way he did that always made him look a little like a model. “You were in love with me. And I broke your heart. I really didn’t mean to. I guess it didn’t even occur to me that you might feel like that, or like I wouldn’t want you.”

Hearing this was just too much. Jensen had no idea how Jared had finally figured it all out; it had been so glaring before and now it was mostly hidden, but he had a pretty good feeling Chad was behind it. Stupid Chad. He should know better than to get in the middle of this entire thing. “You think I _was_ in love with you?”

They pulled up to a red light and Jared turned to face Jensen, brows pulling together. “Weren’t you?”

“You’re an idiot.” Jensen rolled his eyes and purposefully looked away. Jared’s confused expression was too adorable.

“And you’re an asshole,” Jared said through a laugh, continuing to drive as the light changed. “So what, you weren’t in love with me?”

“It’s not so much a matter of past tense,” Jensen muttered grumpily and slid his arms over his chest, sinking down in the seat once more and glaring out the window at the passing town. “Are you trying to mock me or something? Is this some big game to you?”

“Fuck. I really did a number on you didn’t I? You’ve never been this cold to me before. No matter how stupid I was.” Jared sighed and pulled over, slipping his car into park and turning to face Jensen. “Look at me. Come on Jen, please?”

It was Jared’s soft, unsure tone that hit Jensen the hardest. He’d never been able to handle Jared being hurt, especially not at his hands. So he turned to look at Jared, pursing his lips in the annoyance he was barely holding on to. “You don’t even understand, Jared. Can’t you just let this go? Don’t you know by now that I’m not just gonna give it up for you? So whatever this new technique is, just stop.”

“New technique?” Jared frowned and leaned closer, reaching out to drag his thumb over the ring on Jensen’s lip. “Maybe you’re the one who doesn’t understand. Why are you so convinced that this is a game for me?”

“Because that’s all it ever is,” Jensen whispered, far too breathless. He didn’t mean to let it be so obvious, the way he felt, but if the rush of air out of his lungs wasn’t a dead giveaway then Jared would know from the flush of color on his cheeks. Jared was close enough Jensen could smell him and Jensen inhaled deeply because he couldn’t get enough even as he wanted to push away. “You just want my body, you don’t even care that I’m not your friend anymore, you just want to fuck me.”

“Jen,” Jared sighed and curled his finger under Jensen’s jaw, dragging him close enough their lips brushed slowly together. Pleasure sparked through Jensen and he gasped, leaning in out of his control once more because how could he possibly turn away? “You’re so wrong. I miss you so much it hurts. No one knows me like you do. I want more than your body. I want _you_.”

As Jared lips slanted deeper over his Jensen gasped, his fingers curling over Jared’s shoulder and digging into the soft cotton of his shirt to hold on. He needed something to ground him. Because Jared’s lips were soft and warm and better than all those things Jensen had imagined over the years. Jared wasted no time in deepening the kiss, sliding his tongue forward to trace along Jensen’s lower lip. Jensen’s mind spun.

Warm fingers were sliding up his thigh, tracing over his jeans, dipping down to map along the inseam and Jensen moaned softly into the kiss. _Oh fuck_. Jared’s tongue in his mouth, along his own, Jared’s hand between his legs, sliding up until his thumb was ghosting along Jensen’s zipper and well, that was about enough. Talk about sensation overload. 

Pulling back from the kiss, Jensen flattened his hand on Jared’s shoulder and pushed, trying to get some space between them. “This isn’t happening here,” he whispered, maybe a little breathless, lips still tingling and swollen.

“But it’s happening?” Jared, at least, sounded just as breathless and Jensen took satisfaction from that. If he could make Jared feel even a little crazy and out of control then maybe Jensen still had some cards left to play. 

He lifted a hand and brushed his thumb over the ring on his lip, taking a moment to get his thoughts under control. God, his heart was racing. Not just because of the kiss, not because Jared’s hand was still on his thigh. The idea of more, of them, was enough to make him feel dizzy all over again. “You’ve gotta prove it to me. I won’t be another notch on your belt. You really want me? You really miss me? Then fucking prove it.”

Jared stared a moment longer then smiled, dipping down to let hair fall into his eyes. “I will. I’ll prove it to you. Want you as way more than a notch on my belt.” He laughed and squeezed Jensen’s thigh. “You’re gonna be my perfect eye candy.”

Jensen rolled his eyes and slid his arms over his chest once more, turning away so Jared wouldn’t see the hint of a smile on his face. “You fucking wish. Now, can we go to school? My parents said they’d ground me if I skipped another class.”

“Good, you need to knock that shit off, Mister Tough Guy.” Jared laughed and withdrew his hand, slipping the car into drive once more and revving the engine.

Once more they fell into silence but Jensen thought it was different this time, more electrically charged or something. Jensen couldn’t stop thinking about Jared’s lips against his own, the feel of his hand, and that promise for more. And judging from the smile on Jared’s face, he was maybe thinking about the same things. Maybe. Jensen still had to work on getting himself to actually believe that Jared wanted more than just the physical.

They pulled into the parking lot and Jared easily navigated through the kids into a spot, grinning at Jensen as he parked. “So, lunch today? We could hit up Taco Bell and go eat at the park.” Jared leaned across the seats once more, letting his nose brush along Jensen’s jaw bone. 

Jensen swallowed thickly and suppressed a shudder. The heat of Jared’s breath caused his skin to prickle with gooseflesh. “Got plans today,” he forced himself to whisper. He couldn’t give it all up to Jared so easily, what proof would that be? How would he know Jared wasn’t going to just ditch him later? 

So he pushed open the passenger door and slid out onto his feet, dipping down to peer across the seats at Jared. “Jared?”

The boy was watching him, still smiling slightly, and he dipped his head in a nod. “Yeah?”

“This isn’t going to be easy.” Jensen smirked at Jared then turned, shutting the door with a slam and half jogging up to the school building. At least this whole Jared proving it thing could be fun. 

~~

“Tell me why I shouldn’t kick your ass,” Jensen asked through half a hiss as he dropped onto the bleachers beside Chad, brows drawn together in a glare. “Like, seriously. I should put out my next smoke in the middle of your forehead or something.”

“As if you ever would,” Chad scoffed and leaned back on his elbows, offering the cigarette between his fingers out to Jensen. “What’d I do?”

Jensen pinched the filter between his fingers and brought it to his lips, drawing in and slowly blowing out. Smoking wasn’t really his favorite thing but sometimes, when he was stressed out, it really did help. Also, he kind of felt cool when the cigarette was between his lips. “You told Jared how I feel. _Then_ you ditched me this morning so I’d have to ride with him.”

“I have no idea what you’re talking about.” Chad smirked and pulled a new cigarette from his pack, letting Jensen finish his own. “So what happened?”

Jensen rolled his eyes, Chad was a horrible liar, and let his eyes scan across the field and over to the outer quad. He could just see Jared, arms flailing out at his sides as he entertained his dutifully laughing audience. “He kissed me,” Jensen said quietly, watching Jared’s body move. He almost thought he could hear the boy laugh but that was crazy. “And put his hand between my legs.”

“Fucker, I’ll kill him,” Chad huffed, pushing off the bleachers and standing. 

A laugh rose up in Jensen and he caught Chad’s pant leg, tugging him back down. “Slow your roll, Batman. I stopped him before anything happened. I told him if he really wants me, more than just my fine ass, he was gonna have to fight for it and prove it to me. So as much as I appreciate you trying to be my knight in shining armor, sit your ass down before you make a fool of yourself.” 

Chad looked over toward the quad for a moment before sighing heavily and dropping down beside Jensen once more. “So you gonna make him work for it huh? Got any plans in mind?”

“Short of begging and groveling on his hands and knees? Nah, not really.” Jensen smirked and finished off his cigarette with a long drag, flicking the butt over the back of the stands. His eyes settled on Jared once more as he blew out the smoke through his nose. “Any ideas?”

They fell into an easy, familiar silence for a long few moments, Jensen taking another cigarette from the pack as Chad offered it out. Until wasn’t after he’d lit it up and watched Jared move out of the quad and back into the school that Chad answered. “Make him bottom.”

Jensen choked on a laugh and chose not to answer. Chad didn’t need to know how badly he wanted Jared fucking into him. 

~~~

The good thing was, Jensen was talking to him, kind of, mostly. Sure it was a lot more snark and sarcasm than friendly banter but whatever, it was progress. The bad thing though, was how often Jensen was likely to snub him. Jared knew he had his work cut out for him, he knew he was going to have to get creative if he wanted Jensen to truly believe him, but it didn’t seem like the boy was giving him much leeway. 

What Jared really needed was some time with Jensen not in a car or at school or with Chad hanging around. Chad was like a worrisome mother, hovering and scoffing and rolling his eyes whenever Jared even tried to make conversation. Lord help him if he called Jensen out on smoking, apparently that wasn’t something he was allowed to argue. 

Jared had a plan though. It was Friday and there was no practice because of the game the following day. He was supposed to take it easy, relax at home according to Coach, but he’d spent the last five days trying to get Jensen to give him a chance and that wasn’t working so he was about to make things much more serious. 

“Come over,” Jared said the moment he caught up with Jensen outside the school, hooking an arm around the thin waist under Jensen’s leather jacket. 

Jensen huffed but didn’t push away. “Demanding, bitch?”

“Aw come on, Jen, I know you want to.” Jared pressed his lips just beneath Jensen’s ear, not caring so much about the people walking around him. He was kind of untouchable as the star quarterback, and he could kick anyone’s ass who had an issue with it. 

Also, whenever he touched Jensen in front of people, he couldn’t help noticing the way it made the boy smile. He was pleased by the attention, pleased that Jared wasn’t trying to deny what was happening between them. It was such an easy way to get Jensen to forgive him for being an idiot that Jared didn’t mind putting himself out there. 

“Please?” Jared murmured and let his other arm slip around Jensen’s waist, effectively stopping the boy from walking further and pulling him back flush against his front. “We could... watch a movie, or something.”

Jensen’s body sank back against Jared and heat crawled through him like he knew it would. Even with the growth spurt Jensen had gone through over the summer, his frame was still slighter, thin against his own, and Jared laid his palms flat against sharp hipbones. The more Jensen relaxed the more Jared knew he’d won the boy over and Jensen was just holding out to be a tease. “I get to pick the movie,” he finally said and stepped away, continuing to walk, turning only to throw a smirk at Jared over his shoulder. 

“As long as it’s not Legally Blonde or whatever that one chick flick was you love so much!” Jared hollered after him, laughing when the kids walking around them looked their way. When Jensen flipped him off over his shoulder Jared laughed harder and jogged to catch up.

~~~

It had been so long since Jensen had been in his room, Jared was stuck for a few minutes on how to handle him there. Which was weird. His entire life he’d had Jensen over countless times. Hell, Jensen had probably spent more nights sleeping at his house than he had his own if you added it all up. But now, here was Jensen, and Jared’s palms were all sweaty, his heart was racing. 

It wasn’t like it ever was before, not with Sandy or any of the others - not that there had been _that_ many, Jared might have exaggerated the numbers some. Just the idea of having Jensen on his bed made him excited in a way he wasn’t used to. 

“So um, Legally Blonde?” He suggested, shrugging out of his coat and smiling to hopefully hide some of his nerves. Him, nervous, it was kind of ridiculous. 

When he turned back Jensen was watching him with a raised brow, his standard leather jacket halfway down his arms. “You legit own Legally Blonde? You pick that up in sunny Cali?”

“Did you just say _legit_?” Jared scoffed and kicked off his shoes, sending them clattering into the bottom of his computer desk. “You’ve been spending too much time with Chad. You should stop that.”

“And what, spend more time with you?” Once more Jensen’s brow arched and Jared spent a long moment marveling at the way the eyebrow bar curved up with it. “What do you see? When you space out like that? You look at me like you’re seeing something... weird.”

“Not weird.” Jared shook his head and stepped slowly forward, curling his fingers over the edge of the leather coat and tugging down. “Just different. You’re different. Still got your glasses?”

“Obviously.” Jensen was likely going for his usual snark but the word was kind of breathy, the way it got whenever Jared crowded into his space in any way. “You didn’t think I was hot before.”

Jared smiled softly and tossed the coat onto his bed. Jensen was wearing another of those tight white shirts and Jared reached up to trace the curl of the tattoo just under his sleeve. “I didn’t think I could think of you as hot. Jen, you might have thought you were pretty obvious in the way you felt for me but you really weren’t. I had no idea. You were like... my little brother. But I did think you were hot, in a unique way. I mean, look at your lips, how could I _not_ notice those?”

As he let his thumb drag Jensen’s lower lip out he stepped in closer, feeling the faintest tremble coming from the boy and smiling just slightly. “Am I making you nervous, Jen?”

“Don’t get full of yourself, Jared,” Jensen whispered and turned in one swift movement, pushing Jared back until he hit the bed and dropped. He barely had a moment to brace himself then Jensen was straddling his thighs, digging fingers up into his hair and tilting his head up with a tight pull. “You’ve gotta learn you’re not the only one with the power here.”

Jensen’s threat, if you wanted to call it that, shot pleasure through Jared and he slipped his hands around Jensen’s thin waist, tucking his fingers under the warm cotton of his shirt. “And what kind of power do you have?”

“I know how badly you want me,” Jensen whispered against Jared’s lips, rolling his hips forward so slowly the teasing friction made Jared jerk up for more out of instinct. “I can already feel it, you’ve practically been begging for it for weeks. But I know you won’t take me unless I let you. So I’d say I have all the power.”

Jared groaned as the slow roll of Jensen’s hips increased, the friction crawling through at a torturous rate. “All the power. Yeah, sure.” He was panting already which seemed ridiculous but couldn’t be helped. Jensen was like molten lava sitting on his lap and how could Jared not being steadily going insane because of this. “You still a virgin?”

He watched as Jensen pulled back, staring down at him and slowly wetting his lips. “What? You think I let Chad fuck me?”

The idea of Chad touching Jensen had Jared growling possessively, his hands tightening over Jensen’s thin hipbones. “You better not have.”

“Like I would,” Jensen snorted and dipped down, ghosting his lips over Jared’s in the hint of a kiss. “I was saving myself.”

“For me?” Jared had meant to make it a statement, let Jensen know he was already claiming him as his own, but the question slipped out as a soft whisper. He tilted up into the kiss, searching for more, struggling to deepen it. 

Jensen moaned softly into the kiss and pressed harder forward, his nails scraping along Jared’s scalp and locking in his hair. Their tongues slid together slowly and Jensen’s hips rocked harder forward, sending a tremble though his body that had Jared groaning once more. This was so fucking hot Jared already felt like he was going to come, how in the world did Jensen get like this? Or how had Jared missed it?

“For you,” Jensen finally murmured into the slow part of their lips. “Touch me, Jared.”

That was enough of a plea for Jared. His hands slid around to the front of Jensen’s jeans, thumb sliding along the button and slipping it free. Jensen’s fingers continued to massaging along his scalp and Jared closed his eyes, tilting into the touch because it felt good enough to make his cock twitch and swell further. He fumbled with the top of Jensen’s fly, dragging it down roughly and forcing his eyes open once more. 

Jensen’s cock was already rock hard, pressing through his white briefs, and Jared wet his lips as his palm rolled over the cotton down against swollen flesh. “So, no one has ever touched you like this? No one has gotten you off?”

“No one,” Jensen gasped, arms falling to loop around Jared’s shoulders and hold on tight. His hips jerked up into the teasing heat of Jared’s hand and he smiled, tilting up enough to catch Jensen’s lip ring between his teeth and slowly pull out. 

“What do you do when you get yourself off? What do you think about?” Jared asked in a murmur against Jensen’s lips, letting his fingers curl over Jensen’s cock through his briefs and stroking slowly up. “Tell me.”

Jensen moaned and arched into his body, rocking against Jared like he was riding his cock already. _God_ what a thought. “I... finger myself,” Jensen gasped and curled his fingers to dig nails into Jared’s back and slowly tug his shirt up. “Think about your fingers buried in me, your cock.”

“Fuck,” Jared groaned and finally caved to the urge to feel skin on skin, tugging at the hem of Jensen’s briefs and shoving his hand roughly beneath the fabric. Jensen’s cock was radiating heat, twitching against Jared’s hand, and as Jensen’s ass rolled against the maddening pressure in his crotch Jared dropped his lips to the boy’s neck. “You want my cock buried in you? Want me to fuck you open Jen?”

“God, yeah,” Jensen gasped, curling one hand along the back of Jared’s neck and working his hips up once more into the loose curl of Jared’s fingers. “Watched you jack off, you know, couldn’t think about anything but you for days afterwards.”

“That was the point,” Jared laughed deeply and mouthed along the curved black ink of Jensen’s tattoo. “How’d you get these?”

“Chad knows a guy,” Jensen nearly moaned the answer and well, Jared could have gone the rest of his life without hearing Jensen moan Chad’s name like that. His eyebrows lifted as he pulled back and Jensen laughed weakly. “How about, less talking when your hand is on my cock. Yeah?”

“Good idea.” Jared smirked and sank his teeth into the taut muscles of Jensen’s neck, dragging out slowly. His grip on Jensen’s cock tightened, sliding down to the base and stroking slowly back up. Jensen’s body moved like a wave under his, rolling up into the touch and back down, ass grinding against Jared’s crotch in a delicious slow swivel. 

The faster he stroked the quicker Jensen’s moans came, the more the boy writhed and twisted and Jared panted against his neck, struggling to catch his breath. Even that one time he’d had Sandy on his lap wasn’t as hot as this and Jared worked his other hand forward, slipping underneath Jensen’s jeans to roll along his balls.

“Oh, oh god, Jared,” Jensen moaned too loudly and bucked forward, head tipping back, granting Jared the surprisingly beautiful view of smooth skin stretched out before him. “Close. Jesus, fuck.”

Jared pushed up to capture Jensen’s lips in a kiss before the boy could get any louder. Another dozen twist-squeeze-strokes and Jensen’s body was shaking all over again, his orgasm spurting hot and slick over Jared’s fingers. Jensen’s fingers were back in his hair, gripping tightly, his ass rolling hard down against Jared’s crotch and it was enough to tip him over the edge. Something about Jensen falling apart right there on his lap, Jared couldn’t hold himself back any longer. 

He slumped down on the bed moments later, Jensen tumbling with him, their lips lazily rolling together and falling apart as they pulled in deep breaths. His boxers felt sticky and warm but Jensen’s weight was pleasant and pressing over him and Jared slowly pulled his hands free, wiping them on the blankets at his sides. 

“Hot,” Jensen grunted after a few long minutes, rolling off Jared and sprawling out on the bed beside him. 

Jared smiled up at the ceiling, eyes half hooded. His orgasm made him feel all sleepy and tingling and Jensen half pressed against his side just made everything all the better. Jared reached out and slowly linked their fingers together, just to keep Jensen as close as he could. 

“Gonna talk to me tomorrow?” Jensen asked quietly and Jared didn’t even have to look to see how nervous he was. 

Something sad panged in Jared’s heart, the idea that Jensen would really think he wouldn’t, and he squeezed Jensen’s hand just a little tighter. “Yes.”

~~

Nerves were probably the reason Jensen texted Chad first thing the following morning and begged the boy to pick him up. He couldn’t stand the idea of Jared blowing him off, not waiting to take him to school, ditching him or something. It could so easily happen and Jensen wasn’t sure what the fallout would be. Except he knew it would hurt and controlling how it all played out was his only hope. 

When Chad pulled up he darted out to the car, steadfastly ignoring Jared’s house and slipping into the passenger seat. “Drive.”

Chad peeled off down the street, cursing under his breath. But he didn’t ask until they’d gotten at least five blocks away. “What the fuck did he do?”

Jensen signed and rubbed fingers along his brow, lifting his shoulders in a shrug. “He jacked me off. We hung out all evening. It was maybe one of the best nights of my entire life.” The car screeched to a halt as Chad all but stomped on the brake and stared for a long moment out the windshield. Jensen, meanwhile, slowly pushed himself off the dashboard he’d crashed into. “What the actual fuck, Chad!”

When the blonde turned slowly to him Jensen sank back because, well, Chad looked kind of pissed off or annoyed or something. “Are you fucking kidding me?”

Jensen rolled his eyes, it seemed safer than letting the boy know he could actually be a little intimidating, and folded his arms over his chest. “Are you seriously going to lecture me on hanging out with him? I thought you were pushing for it.”

“I’m gonna fucking lecture you on being a pussy ass bitch and hiding out from him!” Chad smacked Jensen hard on the arm and scowled. “You’re an idiot. Now he’s gonna think you’re freaking on him or something. You really want him to back off now?”

That… actually hadn’t occurred to Jensen. And shit. “Turn around!”

Chad snorted a laugh and shook his head, peeling off down the street and flipping a U-turn at the next intersection. Jensen was a little used to Chad driving like a man with a kamikaze mission so he clung to the _oh shit_ handle and closed his eyes. Chad was completely right, he was an idiot, and if Jared never wanted to talk with him again well, that would just fucking figure, maybe Jensen even deserved it.

He had taken the step and trusted Jared the night before. Mainly because he knew he only had two choices. Trust Jared not to screw him over or cut him completely out of his life for good. No longer having Jared in his life wasn’t really an option. And well, if he were completely honest, he wanted Jared too badly to wait any longer. 

Now, if he’d screwed everything up by being nervous and scared, well, he’d maybe hate himself for the rest of his life. As they peeled around the corner onto Jared and Jensen’s street, all the air caught in Jensen’s lungs. Jared was just walking back from Jensen’s place, his head ducked down, hands buried in his pockets, and Jensen’s heart tightened.

“You’re a douche,” Chad grunted and slowed the car once more.

Jensen didn’t answer or even wait until Chad stopped completely. Instead he threw the door open, snagging his messenger bag and leaping out onto the street. His lips twitched in a nervous smile as Jared stopped and looked up at him, his brows drawing together in confusion. 

“Sorry,” Jensen gasped as he leaped over the front hedge of Jared’s lawn and nearly dove into the boy’s open arms. “I was scared. I- I was scared and nervous and I’m sorry.”

Jared’s arms slowly slipped around his chest, hesitating a moment loosely around him. “Scared?”

“That you wouldn’t...” Jensen trailed off, feeling guilty just thinking about Jared being an asshole to him though it had happened before. Many times. “Just thought maybe you wouldn’t be so interested after last night.”

Jared’s arms tightened then, pulling Jensen flush against his body and holding him tighter than Jensen anticipated. “Jen,” Jared sighed and ducked down to press his lips above the collar of the leather jacket. “You have to start trusting me.”

“I know,” Jensen whispered and rest his head on Jared’s shoulder, breathing in his delicious scent in deep lungfulls. “I’m getting there.”

“You cock suckers gonna cuddle all morning or are we going to school?” Chad called out from inside his car through the still open passenger door. 

Jensen huffed a laugh and pulled back to laugh but Jared answered first, twisting to tuck Jensen possessively under his arm. “I’ll get Jen there, you can be a bad influence on him later.”

“Then shut the goddamn door! Jesus,” Chad huffed and dropped back in his seat, glaring out the windshield once more. If Jensen didn’t know better he would think Chad sounded a little jealous. 

Smiling up at Jared, Jensen pulled back and ran back across the yard, ducking down to speak quietly to Chad for a moment. “We’ll hang out later, right?”

“Of course. Can’t get rid of me now.” Chad smirked over at him and shrugged. “Don’t need you to baby me. See ya later kid.”

“Not a kid, asshole.” Jensen stuck his tongue out at Chad then laughed, stepping back to shove the door closed and turn back to Jared. He was maybe still a little nervous about how school would go but Jared was still touching him so that was something. 

~~~

“Heya, Jared,” Sandy’s cheerful voice had Jared stopping halfway down the hall. 

The girl hadn’t really spoken to him since the end of last year and their breakup that had been kind of on the nasty side. Jared wasn’t expecting her, his mind was pretty centered on getting out to the back bleachers where Chad and Jensen were likely waiting, so he just stood there confused for a moment before turning her way. “Um, hey Sandy.”

“How are you? Feels like we haven’t talked in forever.” Sandy stepped forward, tossing hair over her shoulder and smiling in that way she did that used to made Jared feel warm all over.

Now though, he couldn’t even remember that rising heat. “I’m okay. Uh... how are you?” Polite conversation with an ex? Yeah, he could totally do that. Even if he kept turning his gaze over his shoulder because he wanted to be outside. 

“I’m good. I miss you.” Sandy stepped closer but it wasn’t until her small hand settled over his forearm that he realized this meeting was more than just exes trying to be friendly. Sandy had a gleam to her eyes that spoke of a _plan_. She pressed closer, her boobs flattening against Jared’s chest, her tongue gliding over her lips slowly. “We were so good together, Jared. What happened to us?”

“Uh...” Jared swallowed thickly and stepped back, frowning when she simply followed the movement. “You broke up with me because you said I was a jock idiot. And you said you could do a million times better.”

“Oh. Well, I didn’t mean those things. I miss you, really, and we should get together. You know... talk,” Sandy was nearly purring the words, her fingers stroking along Jared’s side slowly. 

He pursed his lips in annoyance and curved his hands low on Sandy’s hips, pushing her as far away as he could and stepping further back, hands dropping heavily at her sides. “No. God, Sandy, even if I was still interested in you - which I’m not - I’m seeing someone else now. So you need to back the fuck off.”

Sandy’s eyes widened in surprise and shock, maybe a flash of hurt, but Jared couldn’t feel so guilty. She hadn’t cared before when she hurt him, why would she care now? “You... I haven’t heard you were with someone! Who is she? How could she possibly be better than me?”

Jared’s eyebrows lifted in disbelief and he rolled his eyes. “ _Jensen_ is a thousand times better than you. He’s gorgeous and he loves me for me and he doesn’t want me just because I’m the most popular boy in school. So get off your fucking high horse, Sandy, and leave me alone.”

The shock was pretty damn clear on Sandy’s face but it was the noise behind him that had Jared reacting, spinning to find the boy in question.

~~

Finding Sandy pressed up against Jared wasn’t as shocking as Jensen thought it might be, it should have been expected, but it did make his heart sink and his stomach roll unpleasantly. Until, of course, Jared pushed her away and told her off and _came out_ to her. Not just coming out, he’d named Jensen as the person he was _with_ and Jensen gasped because he honestly hadn’t truly believed. 

Now though, well, there was no denying it. It was one thing for Jared to be touchy-feely with him - it wasn’t even that rare for Jared - but to tell his ex-girlfriend that he was _dating_ him... there was no taking that back. Jensen’s heart lurched into overtime and he smiled slowly at Jared, quickening his steps to cross the hallway and all but jump into Jared’s arms. 

“Thank you,” Jensen whispered, arms tightening around Jared’s shoulders. 

“Jared, you are not _gay_ ,” Sandy half gasped but Jensen didn’t look toward her. It was nicer to soak into the warmth of Jared’s arms sliding tight around him. “Trust me, I know this.”

Jensen bit his lip to keep from laughing but Jared wasn’t as successful, chuckling into Jensen’s hair then slowly pulling back. He leaned into the heat of Jared’s body pressed against his side and let his head rest on Jared’s shoulder, smiling as innocently as he could muster at the girl as his hand slid back into Jared’s jean pocket, squeezing his ass.

Beside him Jared squirmed and tightened his fingers around Jensen’s waist. “I’m bi, Sandy. Or really, I’m pretty much just Jensen sexually because, fuck, have you seen this boy? He’s sex on legs. How the hell could I possibly resist that?”

Sandy looked maybe a little scandalized but Jensen didn’t really care so much. Jared was his, Sandy could stuff it. “But... Jared...” Sandy’s wide eyes fluttered rapidly, her mouth open still in shock and Jensen lost out on the laugh he was fighting against. 

“Sorry, Sandy, you know how it goes with Jared. He always gets what he wants.” Jensen smirked and turned, catching Jared’s hand and dragging him roughly down the hall. The urge to be all over Jared was pretty damn strong and Jensen was about to show his _boyfriend_ he wasn’t the only one who got exactly what he wanted.


	3. Chapter 3

Jensen was more than a little relieved that Chad was ditching school. Usually he felt a little guilty when the kid left campus or dragged Jensen with him but right now? It was perfect timing. Because Jensen wanted Jared alone. Or as alone as he could get on school campus. Which was currently the half-seclusion of the space under the football bleachers.

“Hey,” Jared sounded nervous, which surprised Jensen because he thought his intentions would be pretty damn obvious considering the way he was dragging Jared across the field and finally under the narrow space between the bleachers and the back fence. “Was um, that not okay? I - should I not have told Sandy?”

“I love that you told Sandy,” Jensen murmured and spun, pushing Jared up against the fence and leaning into the heat of his body. “I love that she’ll probably tell everyone. And now they’ll all know who you belong to. Me.”

Jared smiled and settled his hands on Jensen’s hips, rocking him forward so their bodies could slowly roll together. “Oh yeah? Well good. Because I want everyone to know you belong to me, too. I see the way people look at you now, like they’d love nothing more than to spread you out, touch you all over. But I’m the only one who gets to claim you. You’re _mine_.”

As it turned out, a possessive Jared was a very _hot_ thing. Jensen shuddered with the pleasure of his deep words and he pressed forward, tilting up to slant his lips over Jared’s in a long, deep kiss. Jensen moaned into the kiss as Jared’s fingers easily dipped under the bottom of his t-shirt, ghosting touches over the edge of his tattoo. He was pretty sure Jared had yet to learn just how far the tattoo spread and he kind of couldn’t wait for that day.

Except right now he had better things in mind. Like tasting every inch of Jared’s skin that he could. “You would claim me in front of all of them, wouldn’t you?” Jensen murmured as Jared’s tongue drew back, tracing over the edge of his lip ring. 

“Fuck yeah I would,” Jared half laughed to words, rocking his hips into Jensen’s. 

Knowing he had already gotten Jared mostly hard made the pressure in Jensen’s jeans a little unbearable. He kissed his way down along Jared’s jaw, tasting the smooth warm skin, memorizing Jared’s taste. It was almost a little shocking, to think he was actually experiencing this. Not so long ago it had seemed like an impossibility and now Jensen never wanted to stop. 

He slipped his hands forward under Jared’s shirt, touching him like he hadn’t been able to the night before. His fingers ghosting along the boy’s cut abs, that impressive football-built body that Jensen was kind of addicted to already. “You know what I want to do?” Jensen whispered against the edge of Jared’s ear, sucking the lobe out and dipping his fingers down below Jared’s jeans.

When the boy shuddered against him Jensen felt the giddy rush of power. He might portray the image of confidence physically now but here, with Jared, he actually _felt_ that confidence. Jared wanted him, completely, and Jensen had never felt more sure of his actions. Especially when Jared gripped his ass tight and squeezed, rocking their hips just a little harder together. “What do you want to do?”

Jensen worked his hand between them and freed the button from Jared’s jeans, the air catching in his throat for just a moment. His tongue slid out to trace along the shell of Jared’s ear and he moaned softly, rolling his hips forward then drawing back to tug the boy’s zipper free. “I wanna get on my knees, right here in front of you, and suck you off. Wanna fill my mouth with your cock, Jared? I’ve been dreaming about it for so long.”

A low groan rose through Jared at Jensen’s words. How could it not? Jensen somehow had become sex on two legs and Jared had no idea how he even learned to speak like that. But the mental image of stuffing Jensen’s mouth with his cock was too good to pass up on and Jared’s hand snapped up to curl in thick dark blonde hair. 

“Fuck, Jensen,” Jared moaned the boy’s name and rocked up into the heat of Jensen’s hand snaking down beneath his boxers. “Wanna fuck your mouth, your lips are gonna feel so good around me.”

“I really can’t wait,” Jensen murmured against his ear once more and pulled back, giving Jared a momentary smirk then sinking to his knees. 

Jared’s gaze dropped instantly, and he leaned back against the fence to try and keep the dizzy rush of pleasure from knocking him from his feet. Jensen’s green eyes sparkled as they turned up to him, his kiss swollen lips full and pouting, the soft caress of his fingers as he gently pulled Jared free of his boxers and stroked the full length of him. 

The way Jensen stared so greedily at him, eyes wide, tongue dragging over his lips, was enough to make Jared’s cock twitch in interest. He’d never been stared at quite like that before. Sure, he’d had blowjobs before, but it hadn’t ever really looked like the person providing them _wanted_ to give them. There was no doubt that Jensen wanted to do this and Jared’s fingers curled into a fist through the locks of silky hair. 

“Do it, Jen,” Jared growled low in his throat, pulling Jensen closer and rocking his hips up. “Suck me down like you want to.”

Jensen damn near whimpered, reaching out to clutch Jared’s thighs and drag him close. His lips parted along the head of Jared’s cock, smearing pre-come over the plump swell of his mouth. Jensen looked sinful like that, his eyes closing, pleasure clouding his features, and Jared couldn’t help a slow thrust forward just to take more of the tight wet heat of the boy’s mouth. No one had ever touched Jensen like this and it was just as hot to think that now as it had been the night before. 

“Fuck, god,” Jared moaned, his fingers tightening in Jensen’s hair, his hips rocking just a little deeper. Jensen simply took it, allowed it, wanted it, and Jared tested the boy’s limits. Even if Jensen had never done this before, he didn’t hesitate now. He relaxed his mouth and let Jared in further, tongue working along the underside of his cock in slow sweeps. 

When the cool metal of Jensen’s lip piercing brushed over the pulsing heat of his cock Jared pulled back and free, gripping himself at the base so he could trail the next drop of pre-come over Jensen’s lips once more. 

“You’re a natural,” Jared whispered, the words so deep they vibrated his chest. “How’d you get so good?”

Jensen smirked and flicked his tongue over the slit of Jared’s cock, rolling his shoulders up in a shrug. “Chad says I was just made for cock sucking.”

Before Jared could figure out _how_ Chad might know something like that, Jensen was parting his lips and sucking him in once more. This time he controlled the bob of his head, sinking nearly to the curl of Jared’s fingers and pulling up, picking up speed with the next drop down. 

Jared’s head dropped back against the fence, hips snapping up into the heat of Jensen’s mouth. As it turned out, being buried in Jensen’s mouth was better than he ever could have imagined. The boy’s tongue worked in slow circles around his cock, caressing his skin with each thrust in, pull out. Jensen’s nails dug into the back of his thighs, holding on, pulling closer and Jared tugged at Jensen’s hair as his orgasm rose. 

Then Jensen moaned around Jared’s cock, the vibrating around his skin better than just the wet heat from before. He was balancing on the edge, so close he could barely breathe. Then Jensen lifted his hand and rolled along his balls and Jared came so hard his vision temporarily darkened. 

“Jesus _Christ_ , Jen,” Jared moaned far too loud, only vaguely hoping no one was around to hear, his grip tugging hard enough on Jensen’s hair it had to hurt. 

But Jensen simply moaned, drinking down his release, and Jared forced his eyes down enough to watch Jensen’s hand shove roughly down under his jeans. The boy shuddered against him just as Jared’s cock pulled free and Jared bit his lip to keep from coming all over again. Jensen stroking himself to completion as he sucked Jared off? And here Jared had thought the boy couldn’t get any hotter. 

“You’re like, fucking, walking sex.” Jared huffed and hastily stuffed his softening cock back in before dropping down onto the grass in front of Jensen. The boy blinked blearily and smiled at him, a look far too innocent to match the smears of come still lingering on his lips. “Oh Christ,” Jared grunted and tugged Jensen forward, kissing him hard, thrusting his tongue forward to chase all the lingering wisps of himself painting the boy’s mouth.

They slowly sank back down onto the ground - Jensen was going to get dirty but Jared really could care less - and Jared hovered half over the boy as he kissed them both breathless. When he finally pulled back Jensen was panting, clutching his arm hard. 

“So... that was good then?” Jensen asked quietly, reaching up to drag his thumb over Jared’s lower lip.

Jared arched a brow and smirked. “Made you come in your jeans by shooting down your throat Jen, pretty sure that means it was fucking epic.”

“One of these days we might actually take our clothes off when we fool around.” Jensen laughed and pulled Jared close again.

Before their lips could touch though, Jared spoke. “Let’s make a deal that you never say Chad’s name while we’re having any type of sex again, okay?”

Jensen laughed and nodded. “That mean I shouldn’t tell you about how he helped me practice?”

Jared decided to kiss Jensen instead of find out if that was true or not. There were some things he’d really rather not know.

~~

“I just don’t get why we had to invite _him_.”

The amount of times Jensen had heard something along those lines over the last few weeks was pretty much epic. It didn’t really matter who was saying it, Jared or Chad, one or the other was always complaining about the other one being invited along to whatever they were doing. Which was currently hanging out in Jensen’s basement, watching movies on the big screen. His parents were out with the Padaleckis, would be late no doubt, and Jared had wanted to _spend some time together_.

But Chad had already demanded Jensen hang out with him for the evening - apparently he was being a neglectful friend - and Jensen figured the best solution was just to have both boys over. After all, Jared and Chad used to hang out before. Of course now Jensen felt a little like the rope in a game of tug of war. They weren’t literally pulling him apart but sometimes it really felt like it. 

Jensen was gonna have to do something with Chad soon, just them, because the boy really had been a great friend over the summer and he didn’t want to ditch him just because Jared had finally pulled his head out of his ass and realized how he felt. Speaking of Jared, the boy’s arms were around his middle, holding him between his spread legs. They were leaning against the back of the couch and Jared’s lips were teasing along his neck and over his ear as he spoke. 

“It’s just,” Jared continued, his tongue tracing the uppermost curve of black ink on Jensen’s neck. “Thought it could just be me and you tonight, you know? No parents around. Alone in your bedroom...”

 _Oh god_. It wasn’t like Jensen couldn’t feel Jared’s cock through his jeans pressing right up against his ass. He knew what his boyfriend was thinking and he wanted the same thing. They hadn’t been able to find time for just them in an empty house since getting together. Sure, his parents had eased up a bit once Jensen started spending more time with Jared again - who was still a little angel in their eyes, go figure - but there was only so much they could risk doing with everyone home and the locks on their bedroom doors the only protection. 

“Jared,” Jensen half groaned quietly, trying to focus on the movie on the screen. There was some half naked girl screaming in bad falsetto and running from some crazy psycho with a stupid mask. It wasn’t really holding Jensen’s interest. Especially not when Jared’s leg hooked over his and spread Jensen’s just a little wider, his hips rocking teasingly against Jensen’s ass.

“Thought maybe... you’d let me act out the rest of your fantasies tonight.” Jared breathed against his ear, biting at the lobe around the dark metal piercing. “Maybe... sliding my fingers up in you? Or burying my cock in your tight little hole. I know how much you want it Jensen, you’ve practically begged for it before. So... why don’t you send Chad home and we can go upstairs?”

This was really unfair. Jensen didn’t want to be an asshole friend who blew Chad off because he wanted to get laid. He knew how much that hurt and after all the things Chad had done for him over the last few months, the boy deserved better. But Jared’s words were kind of like fire trickling down his spine and Jensen wasn’t entirely sure if he could ignore them. Already he was so hard in his jeans it was painful to move. 

So he cleared his throat and turned his gaze to Chad, hoping the basement was dark enough to hide the flush on his cheeks. The boy had a half smile on his face, eyes fixed on the screen, and Jensen tackled with the guilt once more. He sighed and tilted his gaze back to Jared, only barely catching his eyes as he twisted. “I can’t just blow him off Jared, that’s not fair. After the movie.”

“But our parents might be home then, or soon after. It wouldn’t be enough time,” Jared insisted quietly, fingers tucking under Jensen’s shirt and teasing along his stomach. “You really want to wait? Even longer? Even after you’ve been waiting all these years?”

Talk about unfair leverage. Of course Jared would use _that_ against him. Well, Jensen was _not_ Jared. He could think with more than his dick - and yeah, he knew Jared was more than that but right now his boyfriend wasn’t doing such a good job at proving that. “You’re gonna end up crashing here anyway Jared, our parents won’t check on us. We’ll lock the door and have all the time we need.”

“But you’ll have to be quiet.” By this point Jared was nearly whining, which would have been funny if Jensen could make any more room for emotions. He couldn’t, Jared’s hot breath on his neck and the steady rub roll of his hips was far too consuming. “God Jen, don’t you know how badly I wanna hear you? I wanna know what it sounds like when you beg for more, when you plead for my cock in you.”

All the air shuddered out of Jensen’s lungs and he closed his eyes, rolling back against Jared because he couldn’t help it. His hands clamped over Jared’s knees, clenching tightly like that could ground him. “Jared...” Now it was Jensen’s turn to whine. How much more could he possibly take?

“Jesus, Jen, do you know how much I want to be buried in you?” Jared whispered and flicked open the button of Jensen’s jeans, apparently not in the slightest bit phased by Chad sitting a couple feet from them on the other end of the couch. “I dream about it. I dream... of fucking up into you, feeling your body spread open around me, pulling me in as you clench. But you know what I want to do before all of that?”

The idea of breathing was starting to get a little impossible and Jensen couldn’t help his panting. He couldn’t look at Chad either because he didn’t want to know if the boy was aware exactly what Jared was doing to him. “W-what?”

“I want to spread you out on your stomach, and map out every inch of your tattoo with my tongue. I want to taste every inch of it and then finish with my tongue sliding over your hole and tasting _you_. Can you imagine my tongue tracing your hole, Jensen?” Jared punctuated his words with the slide of his thumb over the pre-come forming on Jensen’s dick and that, apparently, was Jensen’s limit.

“Chad!” He nearly spat the name as he jumped up, fumbling back and bumping into the coffee table. Chad looked over at him, clearly amused at something, and Jensen ducked down to hide his face and grab the remote. “Sorry, sorry, you’ve gotta go. Um, I- we’ll hang out tomorrow, okay? I’ll call you. Just you and me. We’ll go wherever you want.”

As he flicked off the TV the room fell into darkness and Jensen swiftly crossed to the stairwell, hitting the light switch, keeping his back to the couch. He could go _forever_ without Chad knowing just how turned on he was. 

“You owe me twenty bucks,” Jared said with a laugh and stood. 

It took Jensen a minute to realize that Chad was laughing in return and wait, what? He spun to the two boys, watching Chad pull a twenty from his wallet and hand it over to Jared. “I totally thought he’d hold out longer!”

“Are you kidding me? Did you _hear_ what I’m gonna do to him? Half hour to cave, my ass,” Jared laughed once more and tucked the money away, turning to Jensen with a grin that vanished pretty quick when he saw the look on Jensen’s face. “Jen... don’t jump to conclusions.”

“You bet on me?” Jensen pursed his lips. It was a whole lot easier to not be as turned on as he turned his gaze between Jared and Chad slowly. “You bet how long you could fuck around with me before I made Chad leave?”

“Actually, he tried to get me not to come over at all,” Chad informed, stooping down to grab his coat and pull it on. “He even offered me some money. But I was the one who suggested the wager. I’m a little disappointed you couldn’t hold out longer Jen, thought we worked on those patience issues.”

Jensen scowled and punched Chad’s arm the minute he got close. “So you just sat there and listened to Jared get me all worked up to see if I could hold out? You’re such a sick perv!” Jensen punched him once more for good measure then spun to Jared. “And you! All some bet. _God_. This is why you two always suck.”

With that he spun and headed up the steps, making a beeline for the next set so he could reach the second floor and slam his bedroom door behind him. He wasn’t really all that mad, not really, because this was so typical of Jared and Chad, but he was definitely annoyed. And kind of embarrassed. Chad heard all those _things_ Jared said and it was supposed to be a private thing between them. 

“Jensen...” Jared murmured softly moments before he opened the bedroom door. Of course he’d know Jensen wouldn’t lock it. Damn, Jensen was so weak when it came to Jared. “Don’t be mad at me.”

“Don’t you ever get tired of being an asshole, Jared?” Jensen shot back, dropping down on the edge of the bed to pull off his socks, anything to keep from looking at the pout Jared was sure to be sporting. Jared was exceptionally good at getting his way, as he proved earlier.

“I wasn’t trying to be an asshole,” Jared protested, stepping into the room the rest of the way and closing the door behind hm. Jensen could hear the lock click in place in the pause between his words and that probably sealed his fate. “I really just wanted Chad gone. I wanted just us tonight. It’s not just us very often. And hey, I’m twenty bucks richer, so I promise to take you to Ihop in the morning for as many pancakes as you can eat.”

Jensen’s lips twitched in a smile but he kept his gaze down and stood, fiddling with the open fly of his jeans and pulling down slowly. “You said all those things... and Chad was listening.”

“I doubt it Jen, Chad’s straight, duh.” Jared laughed softly and stepped closer. “I meant every single thing I said. It’s what I want to do, what I’ve been thinking about for so long now.”

Apparently staying angry at Jared was about as possible as it had been before the summer and the fall out and everything. Which was not possible at all. “You really want to... lick? Down there? That’s something you’d enjoy?”

“Hell yeah I would,” Jared murmured and finally stepped against his side, hooking his fingers in Jensen’s belt loop and tugging down slowly. “I want to claim every inch of you Jensen. Right now. Been waiting too long.”

“Have you ever fucked a guy before?” Jensen blurted out the question, gaze finally snapping up to Jared because even if the boy tried to lie, he’d be able to see through it in a heartbeat. “Tell me, honestly, have you?”

“Not all the way, no.” Jared shook his head slowly and didn’t break his gaze. “Put fingers in a boy once but he didn’t like it.” Jared shrugged and pulled a little harder on the jeans, letting them fall to the ground. “Didn’t really turn me on that much anyway. Not that way with you though. I get off more than once a day just thinking about sliding my fingers up in you.”

Jensen’s heart was racing all over again and he swallowed thickly, stepping out of his jeans. Yeah, just like that, he was turned on all over again. “You won’t change your mind after, right?”

“Oh... Jen,” Jared sighed and curled his fingers over the hem of Jensen’s shirt, slowly working up over his abs. “Don’t you know? I’m in love with you. That’s not gonna change once I fuck you.”

Jared’s words sparked through Jensen’s mind and he stared up at his boyfriend, eyes wide, arms lifting automatically as Jared tugged his shirt off and tossed it toward his laundry basket. “You’re... in love with me?”

The smile on Jared’s face softened and he dipped down, capturing Jensen’s lips in a soft kiss, fingers slipping under Jensen’s briefs and slowly lifting then dropping. “Yeah, Jensen, I’m really, kind of crazily in love with you. Now, lay down. I want to see you naked.”

 _Fuck_. Jensen was so screwed. And not just in the literal sense, which was clearly not so far off from happening. The idea alone had him lurching forward, fumbling to the bed and dropping down on his back. He stared greedily up at Jared as the boy worked his way out of the rest of his clothing and yeah, they shouldn’t have waited so long to let this happen. Jared was miles of gorgeous tanned skin and Jensen couldn’t stop staring.

“Enjoying the view?” Jared smirked, rocking his hips steadily from side to side for a moment then stepping forward. “Flip onto your stomach. I’ve never gotten to admire that tattoo the way I’ve wanted to, you know.”

“You keep mentioning that,” Jensen mumbled but he did as he was told, rolling onto his stomach and tilting his head to peer over at Jared. The boy seemed to be frozen in spot, stuck staring or something, and Jensen held his breath. “That bad, huh?”

“What?” Jared laughed softly and stepped forward, kneeling on the edge of the bed, sliding down a moment later. “Fuck no, Jen. You’re so... god, you’re drop dead gorgeous and you have no idea. That blows my fucking mind.”

Jensen’s eyes fluttered closed with a soft hum as Jared’s fingers lifted to trail along his tattoo. Each little caress mapping over dark ink tribal curves had Jensen’s skin prickling, the pleasure building so steadily up in him it was impossible to ignore. Already he felt lightheaded, out of breath, and that was simply from Jared’s small touches and constant stare. How the hell was he going to last until the actual sex?

“You might be killing me,” Jensen mumbled, burying his head in the fold of his arms as if that would ease of some of the embarrassment he felt from being so easily affected. As it was, his hips were rolling shamelessly down in the mattress and every little moment of friction was only adding to the pleasure. 

“Haven’t even started yet,” Jared breathed and dipped down, tongue flicking out. The first touch of moist heat along his skin had Jensen shuddering and jerking back and up into the touch. “Hmm, thought it might taste different or something.”

Jensen swallowed a laugh and rolled his lips together, fingers dragging over the blanket beneath him. “Because tattoos usually taste like...?”

“Wouldn’t know. You’re the only one I’ve hooked up with that’s been inked.” Jared laughed quietly and shifted. 

In the next moment his boyfriend was straddling the back of his thighs and Jensen shuddered all over again. How could he not? Already Jared’s firm weight was pressing down into his back and it was better than anything Jensen ever could have imagined. Pleasure sparked along his veins and he rolled his hips down once more as Jared’s tongue moved over his skin in a slower, longer sweep. 

True to his word, Jared took his time tracing out every curve of Jensen’s tattoo. He swept along the lines, the curves, like an echo of the original ink when it was completed weeks before. But there was none of the stinging pain, just the overwhelming pleasure, and Jensen clutched the blanket tighter to keep from bucking completely off the bed. Each drag of Jared’s tongue over his skin made the air hitch in his lungs and Jensen was so hard the following slow roll of his hips down onto the bed was almost painful. 

“Jared,” he finally gasped, not quite sure he could handle any more of the teasing. “Please. Please, Jared. God.”

“What do you want, baby?” Jared all but growled, working his legs between Jensen’s and dragging his fingers down his sides. “Want my tongue lower on your body? Want to feel me tasting your ass?”

“Fuck, yes,” Jensen groaned and spread his legs wider, giving Jared more room to move. “Stop teasing.”

“I think you like my teasing.” The grin with Jared’s words was obvious and Jensen’s lips twitched in a smile as well, just because that was the way Jared affected him he supposed. 

“I think you’re ego needs adjusting.” Jensen tried to shoot the words back but well, he sounded a little breathless and way past the point of turned on. Because he was. 

Jared’s answering laugh was warm air against his skin, just along his ass, and Jensen moaned and squirmed. Fuck, Jared was taking the teasing thing to all new levels. Just as Jensen was about to protest, plead for more, beg for Jared to _do something_ those long thin fingers were digging into his ass and spreading him apart and Jensen’s eyes snapped open. 

It felt so different from all the fooling around before. He was more exposed, spread open for Jared to examine as he wanted, and Jensen was irrationally nervous. Being open like that wasn’t something he was used to and the longer Jared kept staring, the more Jensen squirmed with the rising nerves. 

“Jared. Stop staring, you’re freaking me out,” Jensen grumbled and lifted his head, straining back to try and see the expression on Jared’s face. What if it was disgusting to him now or something? How would Jensen ever live down that humiliation? 

“Seriously, Jen? You really have no idea how hot this is. How hot you are. I have no idea how you don’t know this.” Jared sounded just as breathless as Jensen felt and it made everything warm in him. 

It also eased the nerves and Jensen wet his lips, squirming back into the touch of Jared’s fingers stroking along the inside of his ass. “You’re not like, freaking out or anything right?”

“Freaking out?” Jared huffed and in the next moment dipped down, tongue sliding out to trail the full length of Jensen’s crack, brushing just barely along the tight puckered hole. 

Jensen gasped in shock, tried not to thrust back into the heat of Jared’s tongue on instinct. The buzzing of pleasure was back in full swing, blurring his vision, causing his blood to race in his veins as Jared’s tongue laved over his entrance time and again. Jensen had never felt anything like it, the slick heat soaking into his skin, and his squirming picked up speed all over again. The friction was nearly too much, almost sending him over the edge. 

“Oh, Jesus, Jared,” Jensen gasped and arched his hips up as Jared’s tongue delved a little deeper, pressing against the tight muscle to try and breach forward. “I can’t... I need. Jared, please. More. Please.”

“So needy,” Jared murmured, that smirk was still there, Jensen could feel it against his skin. “You want me to stretch you open? Want my fingers in you?”

Jensen flushed at the though and pushed up onto his knees, giving Jared no choice but to move with him. Strong fingers gripped his ass, spreading him further apart, and his tongue once more slid along Jensen’s entrance. This time his finger joined the action, spreading Jensen open with spit slick skin, his tongue sliding up to tease just along the inside of Jensen’s hole. 

“Fuck,” Jensen hissed, closing his eyes at the following wave of pleasure tingling along every inch of him. He was completely going to lose it, right there rutting against his bed spread, but he didn’t so much care. There were worse things than coming at the feel of Jared’s tongue and finger sliding up into him. 

Then that wet heat was pulling back and Jensen whimpered, rocking back to find that pressure again because he was nearly desperate for it. Jared laughed softly and let his hand drop heavily on Jensen’s ass in a small slap. “So you’re basically a slut. You know that right?”

Jensen huffed, trying to laugh but mostly just moaning, and shoved up onto his elbows, body bending so his head was resting against his forearms. He was kind of confirming Jared’s words, displaying himself like the proper little slut, but at least it was exclusive for his boyfriend - who was in love with him. Holy fuck. “Drawer. There’s, lube. I- no condoms. Do you have one?”

“Don’t worry about it, I’m clean.” Jared pulled his finger free, causing Jensen to hiss, and quickly dove forward to tug the nightstand open and pull the bottle of lube free. Jensen tilted his head enough to watch Jared hold up the half full bottle and smirk.

Rolling his eyes, Jensen wiggled his ass impatiently. “Shut up and fuck me, Jared.”

“Slutty and needy and demanding. We’re gonna have to work on your patience.” Jared dipped in to press a kiss to his shoulder before sliding back between Jensen’s spread legs once more. “So you want your first time on your hands and knees like this? No romantic notions of us being able to gaze lovingly into each others’ eyes or something?”

Jensen groaned as Jared slipped his finger forward once more, adding a second within moments. Apparently he was taking advantage of the fact that Jensen quite often fingered himself. “Want...” Jensen moaned and rocked his hips back into the slightest sting of Jared’s longer fingers spreading him open in slow twist pulls. “Want on my back. Just, this now. I mean, god damnit Jared.”

“You’re eloquent, too,” Jared teased softly. After a beat he slipped a third finger forward but Jensen was instantly distracted from the burning stretch as Jared spread over his body, tongue slipping out to trace along his tattoo once more. 

It was maybe a little rushed, sloppy, the way Jared was spreading and working him open but Jensen was caught simply on the mind-spinning tingle, the heat of Jared’s body, the brush of his cock against the back of Jensen’s thigh as he moved. It was the suggestion of more and Jensen was nearly trembling, clenching his muscles around Jared’s fingers just to hold him there, as deep as his fingers could get.

Then Jared’s wrist twisted, pushed further up, and those smooth fingertips were ghosting along Jensen’s prostate in a way he’d never quite been able to reach when working himself open. Jensen’s lips parted on a loud moan of his boyfriend’s name, his entire body lurching back into the touch for the steady plead of _more, more, more_. He hadn’t realized before just how intense it could be, how consuming, and he suddenly wanted every single thing that Jared could possibly give him.

“Now, please, Jared,” Jensen gasped, not even caring if Jared was going to tease him again about being slutty and needy. By this point, Jared had to want him just as badly; he could nearly feel the boy trembling behind him. 

“Fuck yeah,” Jared grunted and pulled his fingers free, sliding back enough to shove Jensen over onto the bed. Wasting no time, Jensen quickly sprawled out on his back and spread his legs around Jared, propping up on his elbows to blink bleary eyed up at his boyfriend. Jared was stroking slick shiny lube over his cock, his eyes closed for a moment before they were forced open and fixed on Jensen, darker than he’d ever seen them before. “Gonna fuck you so hard you’ll never want anyone else. No one will ever be better for you.”

Jensen swallowed the thick lump of emotion that crawled up and lodged in his throat. There was definitely a promise to Jared’s words, a truth that Jensen wouldn’t really ever be able to deny. Because when it came down to it, he’d always want Jared. He always had. Even when he tried to pretend like he didn’t need the boy in his life he’d still waited, holding on to some hope that they’d come back together in the end, somehow. 

“Tell me you’ll never want anyone else,” Jared whispered as he crawled up between Jensen’s legs, dipping down to kiss over the swirl of black ink covering Jensen’s collarbone. “Tell me it will always be me.”

Part of Jensen wanted to tease Jared - who was being the beggy, needy one now? - but he simply dropped flat onto his back and stroked his fingers through Jared’s thick golden hair. “Just you, Jared. Always you. Forever.”

Jared pulled back to give Jensen a warm smile before he was shifting once more, drawing Jensen’s legs up to his shoulders and lining himself up. “Gonna burn a bit,” Jared murmured, stroking a near tender caress down Jensen’s side. “I’m just gonna fuck down into you in one swift movement, I think it’ll be better in the long run. But then I’ll give you time to adjust. Okay? So just um, try and stay relaxed and keep breathing.”

Jensen managed half a snort, a retort building on his lips - something about Jared sounding like a really fucked up teacher or something - but he barely managed to form part of the first word and Jared was suddenly there. Just as he said, he slid forward in one hard, sharp thrust that nearly lifted Jensen’s body completely off the bed. It did burn, the stretch strange and uncomfortable, and Jensen gasped and squeezed his eyes shut. The fingers before could never have really prepared him for the sudden _oh-so-full_ , enough to have Jensen’s body tensing up out of his control.

Everything blurred for a long few minutes, Jensen forcing himself to take deep, measured breaths, evening out the tension and discomfort. He held onto the knowledge that it would get better, it wouldn’t hurt so badly, if he just rode out the initial sting. Then Jared’s light touch was registering through his senses, fingers ghosting along his skin, slipping between them to stroke slowly over his softening cock, and Jensen vaguely began to pay attention to the soft murmurs leaving his boyfriend’s lips.

“So gorgeous like this, spread out for me,” Jared spoke quietly through the slow brush of his lips along Jensen’s jaw, across his cheek. “So tight too. Fuck, Jen, never felt something so tight and hot. Could just spend forever here, buried in you. Love you so fucking much, you have no idea.”

Jensen moaned softly and experimentally rocked his hips, repeating the slow swivel with a little more force when he realized it didn’t hurt. Actually, now that the initial burning was gone, the fullness wasn’t really that uncomfortable and Jensen blinked his eyes open, meeting Jared’s lust dark gaze easily. “Love you, too,” he whispered, lips twitching in a small smile before he rocked his hips down against Jared’s once more, heart skipping a beat when Jared moaned and reflexively rolled forward. “Do it, fuck me. Want you to make me yours.”

Their eyes held for just a beat longer then Jared was drawing back, nearly all the way out, and thrusting hard down. Jensen listened to the steady slap of their skin then closed his eyes, arching his neck down into the bed as his body curved up to meet each of Jared’s quick thrusts. It was amazing, more than Jensen thought it would be, and the weight and heat of Jared moving over him was enough to suck all the air from Jensen’s lungs and leave him shaking with each hard quick slam of their bodies.

Jared's angle shifted, his hands over Jensen's thighs gripping tighter as their bodies connected hard and loud. The next series of quick deep thrusts drove right into Jensen's prostate and he moaned loudly, riding out the ripple of sensation with another hard arch into his lover's body. And Jared held that spot, almost expertly driving into it over and over.

"Jared, Jay, oh God," Jensen chanted soft, breathless praises as his nails dragged up Jared's shoulders and buried in his hair. "So close. Jesus, yes, right there."

A brief smile played across Jared's lips then he was dipping forward, bending Jensen's body even further so their lips could crash collide together. As Jared's tongue thrust forward his hips picked up a feverish pace and Jensen could no longer hold back. He'd been holding on too long, the fact he'd lasted to this point was actually kind of impressive.

It wasn’t really surprising to him that his vision completely blurred and his body arched almost unnaturally up into Jared’s as his orgasm hit with painful intensity. All the air rushed out of his lungs in one harsh whoosh, his fingers grasping Jared’s hair so tightly it had to be painful. Though the low, long moan falling from Jared’s lips didn’t seem to speak of any discomfort. The boy’s hips drove jerky thrusts forward into him and Jensen could distantly feel the warm rush of Jared’s release filling him. 

After what felt like a lifetime, though was probably only a couple of completely blissed out minutes, Jared collapsed onto Jensen’s chest, letting the boy’s legs slowly sink down to their sides. Jared’s breath was too hot on the sensitive skin of his neck with each exhale and Jensen sighed in contentment, letting his fingers soothe gently back through Jared’s hair then down his neck. 

“So amazing,” Jensen whispered after a while, tilting to let his lips brush along Jared’s temple. It was almost a little surreal, how he finally had this, after so many years of dreaming of it. With that thought though came the nagging fear that Jared would change his mind, that this all would have been some game with Jensen’s virginity as the ultimate prize. And his shoulders stiffened at the idea, his body tensing with the rise of nerves. 

“Chad is gonna make fun of our schmoopy looks for days you know,” Jared murmured and pulled back, dropping to Jensen’s side and looping an arm around his middle. “We’ll have to get back at him by making out in front of him. All the time.”

Jensen’s lips twitched in a small smile and he rolled to face Jared, reaching up to tuck sweat damp hair behind his ear. “You’re gonna be mine always now, right?”

“Couldn’t get rid of me if you tried.” Jared gave him a sleepy grin and ducked in, rubbing their noses together. “Shoulda realized this before. Could have been ravishing your tiny little body for years.”

“Oh god, you perv.” Jensen laugh and nuzzled closer, folding up against Jared and grinning into his shoulder as the boy’s fingers slid down his back. “Now we can fuck under the bleachers on lunch break.”

“And you call me the perv,” Jared teased but his voice was a notch deeper and Jensen was pretty sure he loved it.


End file.
